Prigione
by Losavech
Summary: Under false accusations of murder, Feliciano is sentenced to spend the last few months of his life in the most hopeless place in the world: prison. Though even such a hopeless place has a light at the end of the tunnel... -AU- Officially discontinued.
1. Chapter 1

**This is an alternate universe (AU) Hetalia fanfiction co-written by two authors. It will be updated weekly, so please bear with us. We own nothing but the lint in our pockets.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>Feliciano hated the bitter temperature of the stone walls surrounding him, caving him inside what was already a tiny cage. He was never meant to be in a place like this where men in uniform glared at him whenever they passed by his cell. Their cold eyes were icy and hateful, but then again, everyone in this place had the same eyes. None of them understood.<p>

He shouldn't be here. He _couldn't _be here. It was all for self-defense, so why did they see him as a cold-blooded killer with no soul, no heart, and no understanding of the precious nature of human life?

Three men killed because of him—yet the lawyers said that he _butchered _and absolutely _slaughtered_ those three men. No, that wasn't true at all. Feliciano was a better person than that.

If he had stabbed them each once—just in the arm or maybe the leg—then that would get them to stop beating him, punching his amber eyes until the light in them was broken, and robbed him of the only valuables he owned at the time.

Now he had nothing and no one.

But maybe death row would be more accommodating to him than how the courtroom was. The story he told was true, but after seeing the forensic photos of the blood splatter on his hands, clothes, the kitchen counter, practically his entire kitchen coated in crimson streaks, even Feliciano had begun to believe that he truly was guilty, no matter how many times he told himself that it was self-defense.

Grabbing the kitchen knife was self-defense. Stabbing one man in the stomach several times was self-defense.

It was all self-defense and he remembered most of it pretty clearly...

He had just come home from work and his apartment door was ajar. He looked around the general area to see who was around before slowly and cautiously stepping into his apartment.

He had no true valuables, really, so why would anyone want to break in and steal anything from him? Maybe they had realized there was nothing worth stealing and went on their way—so he hoped.

Slowly he put down his messenger bag near the door and crept into his kitchen. He had to arm himself somehow in case there were any intruders still and they came at him.

As he finally pulled a steak knife out of the cutlery drawer, Feliciano heard a couple of thumps and murmuring coming from where his bedroom was located. His heart started to race. So they were still here. But how many were there? Judging from the sounds, he knew there had to be two but he really did not want to misjudge. This was pretty much a life or death situation.

He had to call the police. He left his cell phone and wallet in his bag—after all, pickpockets could easily pick his pockets and he didn't have much money so he had to keep his valuables somewhere safe and close to his body (and, mind you, he kept his bag on one shoulder slung to the opposite hip so it would be hard to take the bag from his person). He didn't want to go back to get it, however, considering he'd be in the open and if the intruders happened to come out while he was getting it out... Luckily, his house phone was close—right on the other side of the kitchen.

He managed to make it to the phone but really soon a problem arose... he was only getting the dial tone on his landline. These thieves were hardcore.

The next thing he remembered was a crash—himself being thrown down onto his kitchen table because the intruders had caught him and didn't want to leave any witnesses. And then blood—his own blood getting into his eyes from a cut to the temple and the taste of blood in his mouth from biting his lip during a punch to the face... and someone else's blood. All over, mostly his hands and clothes.

The adrenaline rush from the shock had caused him to black out through most of the struggle. However, when he came to, he was propped against the cabinet with three dead men strewn across his blood-stained kitchen floors.

Apparently one of his neighbors had called the police and that's how he ended up where he was now—in prison, charged with first-degree murder of three men.

Being in a cell was entirely different than being in a warm bed with blankets and pillows scattered across the top of the mattress… thinking about it had Feliciano frowning, saddened by the fact that a month ago, after the long days in court for his supposed crime, he was in that same bed, sleeping peacefully.

Those nights of sleeping in warmth and security were over.

He huddled into what was going to be his new bed for the rest of his life—and according to the court, his life was going to be short-lived.

So this is what it was like to know when and where you were going to die…

Suddenly two guards were outside of his cell and opened the bar doors for him to exit. Did the court see that he was innocent? Had they changed their minds about his sentence? Feliciano glanced at either guard with hope-filled amber eyes, waiting for them to say something before he pushed them aside and ran free to the life he was supposed to be living.

That hope was crushed when the taller of the two guards said, "Welcome your new cell buddy, Vargas. We got a pretty boy for you." They each stepped aside and revealed a black figure was standing behind them. That black figure stepped into the light with a small box held in its hands.

Though that _it_ was actually a _he_, and _he_ was handsome, that was for sure. There was no denying that. But maybe that meant he was a snooty asshole who would end up starving to death because he refused to eat the food they gave out here. Hopefully he wasn't anything like that.

The bars closed again and the two were left to stare at each other until Feliciano spoke first.

"Ciao…?" He waved his hand shyly, unsure of whether or not he should really be doing that in a place like this. Every action was watched and judged, and if one is seen as weak, then they were dead within seconds. No mercy or special privileges at all.

"Oh, so you're a guy," the other responded, setting his little box on the bottom bunk where it seemed that he was going to be sleeping from now on. "Standing up, it seemed like you were a girl. No offense, but I was starting to worry that they had put me in the women's wing instead of the men's. Those fuckers would've too, just to piss me off."

Feliciano only hummed and went back to huddling in himself against the floor, his way of escaping the prison walls so he may enter his previous life where all was well, nothing could hurt him.

"By the way, I'm Lovino," the man supposedly named Lovino said, interrupting Feliciano's train of thought.

"Feliciano," he replied.

"How old are you? You can't be any older than nineteen, I'm guessing."

"Actually, I'm twenty-three, but people tell me I look young for my age, though I think twenty-three is still young."

Lovino sat down in his bunk to get comfortable and once relaxed enough, looked back at Feliciano with a weird sort of glint in his emerald eyes, as though he was fascinated with whatever Feliciano had to say.

"I'm going to hate to see you die, kid."


	2. Chapter 2

The nausea and aches from yesterday were little pinches to the skin compared to what Feliciano had to wake up to in the morning. The mattresses given to the prisoners weren't great at all for the back or neck, so waking up had him as stiff as a board, and it was absolutely difficult to even sit up.

Though when he did, his head ached as though someone had hit him in the head with a frying pan, almost like when those thugs had hit him with a bat.

Or was it a pipe? Either way it hurt like hell and left him with a migraine as it did now.

Feliciano cupped his head in both hands and groaned until remembering that he had a new cell buddy to think about when it came to being annoying. He stopped his painful groans and instead let himself lay back down onto the stiff mattress.

He wished he had a blanket to cover himself with or a pillow to have his head rest on, but those thoughts led to him whimpering very quietly—it hurt to think about home.

"Are you okay up there? Kinda sounds like you're masturbating," Lovino suddenly blurted out from beneath him. "If you are, then could you be more quiet and subtle about it? I need my Goddamn sleep."

Maybe the annoying one was actually his cell buddy. _Buddy_.

"I'm not masturbating," came Feliciano's blunt reply.

"Then what the hell are you doing?"

"_Crying and wishing that I was in a place where I'm far away from you and these guards and these cold walls and this damn prison_," was what he wanted to say, but that would reveal his weakness, and even his cellmate had to be judging him. Everyone was judging him.

But maybe admitting that would get him some sympathy from Lovino, possibly empathy, because it seemed that they were in the same situation of being on death row for the next few months. Though he had no idea what the other's story was, and he wasn't going to ask anytime soon because he needed to recover from his own tragedy.

Well, not really _recover_, but accept that he was going to die and killed three people and was in prison and wasn't going to have any actual friends in this place because of course they were all going to see him as weak and useless and why be with a person like that…

The rambling quickly stopped and Feliciano came to, blinking and turning onto his side so his back was facing the wall.

"Nothing. Sorry for making noise."

He heard the person underneath shuffle in his own bunk, probably trying to get comfortable again as he did practically every five minutes. It was no wonder Feli was having such a hard time sleeping all of a sudden now that someone under him was moving their bunk bed the entire night because he couldn't get comfortable. Yet it was pretty much impossible to get comfortable in these bunks unless there was a blanket…

Again with the blanket.

There was an… awkward silence between them for about two or three minutes, both men laying in their bunks and staring at whatever was above them. For Lovino there was Feliciano's bunk above him, so at least he didn't have Feliciano's eyes staring at him from below. And the younger of the two knew that those hazel eyes were watching him, even if there was a mattress between them. Knowing that his eyes were locked on him just made things all the more awkward.

"What are you in here for?" Lovino asked, once again breaking the silence between them no matter how awkward it may be. He was really good at doing that. And so this is what Feli would expect for prison life. _Happy happy joy joy._

Feliciano shifted nervously. "I'm not comfortable talking about it."

And yet again was there those moments between them that stayed completely silent, the air thick with what could only be described as uncomfortable.

"What are _you_ in here for?"

"I'm not comfortable talking about it," Lovi replied, and from the sound of playfulness intertwined in those words, it was obvious that he had a coy grin laced on his lips and was trying to tease him.

Though that tease resulted in a pouting Feliciano, it made the atmosphere lighter and more at ease than before when it was just the two of them lying on their beds with nothing to do or talk about.

However, that pleasant moment of shared solitude was interrupted when the bars of their cell were roughly unlocked and opened and the loud, obnoxious voice of one of the guards shouted it was breakfast time.

"Up and at 'em, pansies," he barked gruffly at Lovino and Feliciano, his arms crossed atop his chest as he stood in the doorway of the cell.

Feliciano stiffened. He hated going into the cafeteria or the rec room or pretty much anywhere with any of the other convicts were in numbers. He never had a moment of peace in those places; there was always someone picking on him. One time he was almost punched.

Lovino, as if he were already used to this, sat up and stretched before hopping to his feet, striding over to the guard in the cell doorway. "No breakfast in bed?" he asked. "Rude."

"Get in line, pretty boy," the guard growled at him, stepping aside to all but push Lovino toward the direction of the convict line for breakfast. "You too, pansy," he shot at Feliciano, glaring up at the top bunk.

Feli scrambled down the small ladder of the bunk bed, fidgeting as he walked past the guard to join Lovino in line. Once he was behind the older man, he bit his lip and leaned in to whisper to his cell buddy. "I don't know who I hate more; the guards or the other convicts."

Lovino leaned back a bit, keeping his eyes forward for any sign of the line progressing. "What do you mean 'the other convicts'? They stink more?"

With an impatient narrowing of his eyes, Feliciano shook his head. "No. I mean they're all a bunch of brutes who pick on the newbies and the weak. Almost got myself a black eye because on my first day here, I sat down at what seemed like an unused table, but it 'belonged' to a gang."

"Damn. You think that if I start hanging out with you, they'll come after me too? I can't afford to have this face damaged since there are so many people to impress here," he said with sarcasm practically dripping from his lips.

Before Feliciano would ever be able to reply, the guards yelled and motioned for the line to begin walking to the cafeteria, so he had to stare at the back of Lovino's head the whole time. It helped calm his nerves knowing that he had someone to sit with and talk to since the air had been cleared. And he wasn't _that_ bad of a person. Lovino hadn't beaten him up yet, that was for sure.

* * *

><p>The cafeteria wasn't that big because the prisoners were sent into the room at different times, which also meant they had about a half hour to finish their meal before the next group of convicts would be sent in. That didn't sound too bad, to be honest.<p>

The only thing about the place was the fact that the other prisoners had to eat with each other, even though his cell buddy might be able to keep him company. Yet in all honesty, Feliciano felt that he would actually attract more of those gangsters to him since Lovino was kind of an asshole around people, and him being one of the more good-looking men of the prison would probably mean that they'd want to ruin those good looks by beating him to death. That was a pretty thought.

Those that served the food were other prisoners who glared at the two men as they got their food, though the older of the two was pretty much oblivious to the glares. But whenever he did catch another set of daring eyes, his hazel ones would grow cold and heartless, which would end up with the first set of eyes averting away.

Once sat down, Lovino was immediately at Feliciano's side, already eating his breakfast that consisted of a fresh orange, a bowl of oatmeal, some bread smothered in jelly, and a cup of skim milk. The food here wasn't bad either. The big problem with prisons was always the people, be it guards or those imprisoned.

Feliciano had the same thing; all of the prisoners had the same thing. Another problem with prison: everyone was treated the same and received the same of everything.

"I never got to ask you who punched you in the eye," said Lovino.

"Oh, that…" Feliciano searched the room quietly and unnoticed, pointing his chin in the direction of the group of gangsters. All of them had tattoo sleeves on their arms as well as tattoos on their necks and those with their hair shaved had some on their head too. They were definitely intimidating when it came to their looks and the way they had booming, deep voices and their muscles might seem frightening too…

Lovino swallowed. "A-Ah, they're probably like animals, y'know, more scared of you than you are of them."

That little joke actually made Feli chuckle this time, in which he covered his smiling lips with the palm of his hand. "I doubt they're scared of me at all."

"You're probably right. I bet—"

"_And_ you. Those good looks of yours will only get you so far in here. The reason they call you 'pretty boy' is because it's meant to be insulting and acts also as a threat." Feli took a sip of his milk before leaning in to speak lowly to his companion. "Pretty boys are either beaten or raped or both in this prison—any way to disfigure good looks. And if the guards don't see it, they do nothing about it. They just send you to the infirmary to get patched up and blame it on something like tripping or sports. Just a warning."

Lovino looked taken aback. He wasn't expecting such a tone from Feliciano. It was heavy with… hatred? Though he didn't blame the boy. Just the thought of what could happen to, well, him, made him nearly push away his breakfast. He cleared his throat, voice a little cracked, his smartass bad boy façade lowered. "Well. Guess I better not drop the soap," he said flatly.

His response was a no-nonsense straight face that borderlined on a glare; obviously Feliciano wasn't going to brush this information off with a bit of dry humor. Stiffly, Lovino looked back down at his breakfast.

* * *

><p>Later that day, after the guards had sent the prisoners to the fenced area outside of the jail, Lovino sighed and watched the other men walk around and argue with each other. It was utterly boring just to be sitting there, and things were weird again when it came to him talking to Feliciano.<p>

He had tried earlier once breakfast was over, but that only resulted in another one of his annoyed glares. The boy had such a temper. But why? All he had done was try to make light of the situation they were in, even if that situation meant going down the road to death. Even the pretty boys have to die someday.

He could try talking to him again, though they were now about two yards away from each other, Lovino standing and Feliciano sitting on the ground as he had done the day before when they first met. Things were a little less complicated back then since as of that morning they were getting along until the fiasco about the gangsters came up.

Thankfully those same gangsters were on the other side of the courtyard and not giving Lovino or Feliciano a hard time like they had supposedly done to the younger the other day. How long had he even been in this place?

No matter how badly he wanted to continue asking questions, Lovino stayed as quiet and unnoticed as possible so that no one would bother him about anything.

When he tore his eyes away from the ground, he found them locked onto Feliciano and then to the stick that he had in his hands, and at the end was some sort of inscription in the dirt. Curiosity got the better of him so Lovi walked towards him and kneeled beside of him, eyes still glued to whatever he was writing in the dirt.

Only it wasn't writing. It turned out to be a gorgeous drawing of a tree with branches that hung in such a way that it suggested they were flowing in motion with the wind. The leaves had fallen from it, so it seemed, but either way, it was still an incredibly outstanding piece of work for only using a stick and some dirt.

"You draw really well… honestly. You do. But I bet you've heard that a million times before, right?" Lovino asked with a small smile placing itself upon his lips.

"Yeah, I do, but I always thank the people who say that, so… um… grazie." Feliciano's eyes averted away from the other's hazel ones, yet it was clear as day that he loved being praised because there was a faint blush dusted across his cheeks. It was probably embarrassing too.

For what seemed like an entire day, the older man watched the younger create more brilliant works of art, such as a cloud inhabited with laughing angels, a boat circling its way around the seven seas, and three men dressed in baggy clothes, which resembled a lot of the men that were in close proximity.

Their hour of being outside was up, which meant lining up again for the guards. Once in their appropriate spots, Lovino turned his head a little to the side and whispered, "Hey, do you think that you can teach me how to draw?"

Feliciano glanced up and shrugged sheepishly. "I guess. Ask me again when we're in the cell. Now's not the time."

And so Lovino waited.

"So can you teach me how to draw?" he asked once more.

The younger looked displeased and annoyed again, though the glint in his eyes said otherwise.

"Sure. But why do you want to learn so badly?"

Lovino shrugged. "I want to do something good with my life before it ends. Watching you draw… I want to be able to do that. I want something people will remember me for. I don't want to be forgotten."

This seemed to brighten Feliciano's darkened demeanor and the boy actually smiled—a real smile. "Then ask the guard for a pencil and paper."


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few days, Feliciano spent the hour of their rec time teaching Lovino how to draw. The older Italian seemed determined but with his constant "I'll never be good"s, he just didn't have his heart in it. Finally, Feli sat him down and lectured him about it.

"You're doing well, Lovino, but… your heart just isn't in it," he told him one morning while they were taking their seats for breakfast. "You're determined and that's good but… you need to have an emotion behind your art. Something like… what you love. Or something you hate. Something with feeling behind it. That is what makes art art."

Apparently his lecture did get through to him because after lunch during their rec time, Lovino was silent the whole time through their art lesson, except for the occasional "Is this right?" He even asked for extra paper to work on his art later that night but wouldn't tell Feliciano what it was he was drawing.

"Just doodles for practice," is all he would reveal.

And for hours would he see Lovino sitting in his bunk, expressions switching from happy to sad as it seemed that he was practicing different types of facial expressions. One had Feliciano burst out laughing because of how silly it looked, though Lovino argued that it was meant to be a dashing smirk that would woo all the ladies back in his home.

This sprung up the younger's curiosity again since he still had no idea where Lovino was from or why he was in jail or if he had a lover back home. He wondered about the last question the most, seeing as the man was such a pro with the ladies and his good looks probably would have meant that women were all over him.

Then again, he was quiet and kept to himself, or at least here he did. There were a lot more questions Feliciano wanted to ask him, but after last week's failed attempt of trying to get to know his cellmate, he worried that another would come if he ever tried again.

So he watched the man sketch and get frustrated with his work, saying it was horrible and that he would end up dying without making a difference in the world, which would mean he'd have to then calm him down by telling him to remember all the happy things in life and let that inspire him. Lovino would go back to being quiet after awhile, wipe away the tears of frustration and anger, and continue with his work.

Feliciano thought him a bit insane, but they were all going insane anyways.

One night Lovino fell asleep on his sketching and Feliciano, wide awake, didn't want him to stab himself in the eye with the pencil in his sleep, so he climbed down from his bunk and reached out to Lovino where he was laying on his belly, paper on his pillow and pencil in his hand. Carefully he took the pencil from his hand and turned to place it on the small desk chained to the floor they had in their cell, freezing when Lovino mumbled something in his sleep.

When he quieted again, Feliciano placed the pencil down and then turned back to get the paper from under Lovino's cheek. No doubt the pencil lead would leave some marks on the older man's skin but they could be washed off. The paper being crumpled would not be fixed, and Feli knew that Lovi would have a fit if his work was ruined.

Ever so slowly and carefully, Feliciano slid the paper out from under his cellmate's cheek and once fully out from its constraint, the young Italian held it in both hands. He paused to make sure that Lovino didn't wake up before turning around again to place the paper on the desk. However, the doodles on the paper made him stop—and his heart.

On the paper's face, there were four doodles, roughly sketched out. One was of Lovino himself—he was in the center of the paper. The other three were in a triangle around him. One was of a malicious looking group of thugs, all dressed in black. The one on the opposite side was of a young girl, with daisies in her hair and a big smile on her face. And finally at the top of the sketch of Lovino in the middle was… was him.

Feliciano stared at the little doodle of himself, taking in its features. He looked sad. There was a note beside it, which only read "Unreadable". What did that mean…? He realized that there were one-worded notes on each of the doodles. The one with the thugs read "Guilty"; the one of Lovino himself read "Innocent"; and finally the sketch of the girl with the daisies read "Home".

"Home"?

Was this girl related to Lovino? Or was she… was she his lover…?

Suddenly feeling very guilty of intruding on Lovino's life, Feliciano quickly turned and put the paper down next to Lovino on his pillow and climbed back up into his bunk.

Just what did those things mean?

He heard Lovino shift again in his sleep and wondered what he was dreaming about. It could be he was dreaming of the girl, possibly his sister since he had described her as being his home, yet it was more likely to assume that girl was his lover, maybe even his wife. She looked very beautiful and happy in his sketch, the daises adorning her hair in utter perfection while that smile could melt anyone's heart, no matter how cold.

Maybe she was dead on account that Lovino had never gotten a call from anyone or he broke her heart before he was sentenced to death row. Feliciano hated not knowing what was going on in Lovino's head, but still, he wished that he was dreaming happy dreams of her and his home.

She could be his inspiration, his happy thoughts.

But Feliciano was jealous. He didn't have anyone back home to smile or even cry for. He barely had a home in the first place. The little apartment he had was a home, yes, but he couldn't call that a real home. A real home had people inside of it, people that loved each other, and that could mean two people or twenty people. Feliciano only had himself and the floorboards, really.

For the first time since before Lovino came here, Feliciano fell asleep feeling utterly alone.

Lovino woke up with a start, knowing that he had fallen asleep with a pencil in hand and paper under himself at some point in the middle of the night. But that paper was on his pillow and the pencil was on the desk, far from anywhere he could ever have possibly placed it while he was asleep unless he had been sleep-walking at some point.

He sat up and knocked on the mattress above his head, yelling at him, "Did you look at my sketch? Feliciano! Get the hell up! Did you look at my sketch?"

Feliciano sat straight up as soon as he heard his name, and he covered his ears to keep the loud clatter of metal from hurting his eardrums. Startled by Lovino's yells, he cried, "I-I did! I'm sorry! I didn't want you to accidentally stab your eye out because of the pencil in your hand, a-and I also didn't want you to crumple the paper because you were sleeping on top of it…"

He gulped, huddling into himself as protection.

"You worked so hard on it and have been frustrated with yourself… I didn't want you to lose a good piece of work and cry again."

The other man went silent, sitting down in his bunk again while Feliciano hung his head over the side. He looked so much like a child when he did that, with his hair hanging loosely and eyes wide and fearful. Lovino hated himself for scaring the boy like that.

"Why was I on the paper…?" Feliciano asked quietly with his head still upside-down, fingers curling on the side of his bunk. "And who was that girl? Is she y-your…" he trailed off, blushing.

A sigh left Lovino's lips. Of course he didn't want to tell him about his past; he'd rather forget the past and everything else that was involved in his life before prison. But there was nothing he could do about it now. Feliciano had already seen the girl.

"She's the reason I'm here..." Not saying anything else, Lovino quickly addressed the first question Feliciano had. "And I drew you because you're, like, right there in everything I do and I might as well use your face for practice."

Yet Feliciano was still dissatisfied with that answer. It was vague and only gave him the knowledge that somehow that girl led to Lovino being in this sort of place. But what else did that mean? Did he kill her? Did she frame him and that's why he wrote "Innocent" next to the sketch of himself? Or did he have to kill someone for her?

Knowing who she was would answer a generous amount of all the questions he had in mind. Nevertheless, he didn't ask anything else. He didn't trust Lovino entirely either when it came to mentioning his own backstory, so he could understand why he felt the same. Or at least he thought he felt that way.

Feliciano never really did know what was going on in his head.

But he was sure by the time they both met their ends, he would at least learn something.


	4. Chapter 4

Feliciano's sentence on death row was pushed back another month because the prison didn't have enough funding to kill him. He considered himself lucky for that; he had to continue teaching Lovino how to draw before he died, after all. It was similar to what Lovino had said before.

He didn't want to die without people remembering him for at least something_—anything_—so long as it was good.

When he told Lovino about the death sentence being pushed back, the man beamed and nearly jumped out of his bunk because he was so happy that he could resume their drawing lessons. He was doing much better too, so with more time for them to practice, the better he would become.

Yet it was awkward to think about the death sentence as a good thing. He was going to die in the end anyway, so why bother with celebrating the fact that he was only going to have another month to live? His time was short; he only had another year left to live, and with him being in prison for that year, he couldn't exactly check off everything on his bucket list.

All Feliciano could do for the rest of his short life was teach someone else how to make their own short life worth living for the next year or two. Who knows if the death sentence would be pushed again and he'd have all the more time to teach Lovino how to draw. It didn't sound too bad, but again, he was dying at some point.

At least he was living for something. Someone.

Even if that someone was another person on death row with him. It counted for something, right?

He never really had anyone to inspire like this. While he had many acquaintances, people pretty much avoided him; saw him as that 'freak with the paintbrush'. When people called him annoying, he had stopped trying to fit in, and pretty much became a loner. At least he had his paintings. He also had a stray cat that he'd visit every day on his way home. But now he didn't have any of those things, except for the drawings and… and Lovino. But how much longer would he be able to keep them?

Come to think of it, Feliciano had no idea how long his cellmate's sentence was. He had only assumed it was a couple of years but he wasn't sure. Nor had the other man told him.

When he asked him one morning, the redhead shrugged and said, "Until they get tired of seeing my immense beauty."

At least he had a humor about it.

Maybe Lovino was teaching him something too. Feliciano just couldn't quite place it though.

He asked again and this time Lovino actually gave him an answer. "About… um… I think they said it was scheduled to be around a year and a half from now. Looks like you're stuck with me until then, but I guess that's not really a punishment, is it?"

And not a second later did he wait to flash his cocky smirk again like he always did whenever he was a smartass, only this time it caught Feliciano by surprise and had his cheeks turning red. He had no idea why he was blushing since he was already used to his smirks and grins and teases, but he couldn't help it this time.

_Why am I blushing? Why am I blushing? Why am I blushing?_ _Stop blushing!_

Feliciano internally slapped himself out of blushing, but with how long it seemed to take him to stop, Lovino could have seen his red cheeks at any point of time. But did he? He couldn't tell due to the fact that Lovino was on his bunk again, sketching.

Maybe he wouldn't say anything. With the one night of seeing Lovino's private sketches, it was already awkward between them. There was no need to make it even more so.

So he climbed into his bunk and laid there with the ceiling above his head, bored out of his mind now that a certain cellmate had decided it was time to stop talking again.

Lovino wasn't much of a talker despite it appearing as though he could talk all day long until he ran out of things to say if that were even possible for him. He was vague and acted as though he didn't care about dying or anything else as a matter of fact. Maybe he just didn't like to talk about anything but his looks. Or maybe he was afraid to. The girl in the sketches from that one night—she was drawn with warm memories in mind, it was obvious in how Lovino drew her. Maybe Lovi was just afraid to get close to anyone again.

That was when Feliciano got the idea.

"Hey, Lovino?" he called softly, flopping over to hang his upper body off of his bunk to look down at his friend below on the bottom bunk. "I have an exercise for you and your drawing."

The man craned his head to look up at him. "What?"

Feliciano smiled. "Do a visual diary. Draw how your day was—your thoughts, feelings, what you saw and liked about the day, what you didn't like... and if you want, I'll only look at the least-private stuff so I can see how you've been improving."

The idea seemed to make Lovino tense a little and there was a small wave of different emotions on his face that made this the first time Feliciano had ever seen so many reactions out of the older man at one time. It was a little overwhelming and the boy had to glance away for a moment.

After what seemed like forever, Lovino responded quietly with a question. "Only what I want you to see, right? You won't be looking at the other stuff like you did that one night?"

Again the pang of guilt hit Feliciano as he was reminded of how he had intruded on something pretty personal of his companion's. But he nodded—he'd keep that promise; all he wanted was to get a little communication out of the other man.

"...okay, I'll do it," he heard Lovino reply, a bit of resignation in his tone.

Unable to help it, Feliciano's smile spread across his face until he pretty much beamed down at Lovino. "Really? Oh good!" he cried happily. Finally he was going to get a chance to know more about this man he'd come to be friends with.

"Yeah."

He barely caught the light blush on Lovi's cheeks before the southerner dropped his head again to focus on his doodling. And he would never admit it, but seeing _him_ of all people blushing like that was a little funny and also a tiny bit adorable.

No, it was downright cute and made him smile. He truly couldn't help himself when it came to finally letting his emotions out.

"Are you going to keep staring at me or am I going to have to smack you?" Lovino asked accusingly, peeking up at him from where he sat in his bunk.

Immediately, Feliciano hid himself and tried not to giggle.

He could hear Lovino grumble to himself about how weird it is to stare at people while they're trying to concentrate on something important and some other nonsense that made no sense to him, but seeing him blush was definitely worth the grumbling.

While Lovino sat in his bunk, a sudden thought hit him, and a rather sad one at that. He had no idea where the thought even came from, but it was possibly the emotions he felt while drawing, almost like what he had been asked to do by communicate through his sketches. His concentration then left the pencil and paper so his head was lifted and nose was pointed towards the top bunk where Feliciano lay.

There was a silence between them that followed.

"I never really thought of twelve as middle aged," he blurted suddenly, not even expecting such a thought from himself. Really, he was optimistic about the situation he was in, but thinking about the girl and his home and the years he spent playing around with old friends who probably didn't want anything to do with him anymore… he never would have guessed those years were not childhood, but the half of his short life.

The air thickened in their tiny cell once again as it did practically every few hours or so. Feliciano sat up and repeated the earlier procedure of hanging his head over the side of the mattress to meet Lovi's gaze.

"I never thought of that either… I didn't think I'd end up in prison to begin with since I-I…" He coughed and shook his head. "Never mind that."

"Still not comfortable with talking about it?"

Slowly, the boy nodded and sighed, though it was true that he didn't want to talk about the past—the bad things. It hurt to know that his being in the wrong place at the wrong time meant his death.

"You're not either," he retorted, though he was hoping that Lovino's art would at least hint so that he could help the guy better. It was better to know what was going on inside someone to understand what their art is about. Otherwise, no one would be able to see the beauty of the art.

A genuine smile on Lovino's face caught him off guard yet again.

"Yeah, I know," Lovi said. His smile slowly turned into another smirk when he noticed Feliciano's blatant blush. "You're so weird." He rolled back over to continue working. "They must've thought it was a crime to be as weird as you and wanted you off the streets."

Feliciano huffed and picked himself up, flopping back onto his hard mattress, hearing a chuckle from the bunk below him.

"There's no need to huff about it. I was only speaking the truth," he teased, resting his head down on the pillow for the moment so he could take a break from doodling. And he wouldn't say so, but Lovino was absolutely frustrated again, and maybe teasing Feliciano would get rid of some of that stress for now.

The younger folded his arms defensively and ignored him, throwing another huffing fit as his cheeks burned brighter. He continued to wonder why it was so easy for Lovino to embarrass him. Of course he thought he was weird—everyone back home thought he was weird and that's why they stayed away from him—but hearing it from Lovino made him self-conscious and guarded.

Yet somehow Feliciano being defensive meant that Lovino would let his own walls down so he could tease him.

"You're weird too," was the best comeback Feliciano could think of. He nearly smacked himself on the forehead but let his pillow do it for him, willing himself to shut up. He was embarrassing himself enough.

There came another chuckle from underneath the bunk, which meant Lovino thought his stupid comeback must have been hilarious. His cheeks burned brighter than before, embarrassed and humiliated with himself for saying something idiotic and childish in front of him. He shut his eyes and wished that his life would end already if it meant he wouldn't have to die of complete humiliation.

And then he heard Lovino's chuckling turn into a scoff.

"I know I am."

Those two amber eyes opened again and stared at the ceiling. For once, Lovino's tone actually sounded… lonely. He had heard him be frustrated or happy or sad or arrogant, practically every other emotion besides loneliness.

Feliciano wanted to tell him that he shouldn't feel lonely because he would be here in this cell until they decided it was time for him to die. He wanted to say that he felt lonely too and maybe that loneliness would go away after awhile. It already had since he had arrived in his cell, though that one night of seeing his drawing was an exception. He wanted to let down all those walls so there wouldn't be a reason to feel so lonely… so sad, lost, and confused.

He hung his head over the side once more so that Lovi could actually hear him clearly when he would speak all those thoughts, but he stopped when he saw a tear rolling down the man's cheek, yet it was never meant to be there.

"Maybe you're right," he mumbled, "maybe I am a little weird. But so are you. You're cocky and arrogant and think you're all that… but you're funny."

Lovino glanced up this time after that one tear had fallen so it seemed that he had not cried. His eyes showed no red in them nor were there more tears to be seen. It could have possibly been his imagination that he was crying, but then again, Lovi was great at hiding his feelings.

"Please don't cry."

Lovino pouted at him. "I'm not crying. I saw my reflection in the metal and it was so beautiful that I couldn't help but tear up a little."

Feliciano only snickered.

"I'm going to bed anyways," he informed, sitting up and flicking the poor boy in the forehead, of course resulting in him whining.

Their eyes were locked on each other afterwards, trying to find any signs of emotion from only a moment ago. It felt like a moment ago anyways; time flew by when all one could do was stare at the ceiling for a meaningless amount of hours.

Lovino barely leaned forward and let out a sigh… only that sigh twisted into another one of his famous smirks. Feli glared at him for teasing him again, but nonetheless, he returned to lying on his bunk with the stone ceiling above himself.

"Goodnight," he heard his cellmate mumble under his breath, the sound of him shuffling onto the cold mattress rattling their entire bed.

"Goodnight," he replied sleepily, letting his eyes slip shut for the rest of the night.

Another mumble came from beneath his bunk, but Feliciano ignored it because it was probably Lovino sighing or yawning, possibly sleep-talking if he was that tired already.

Everyone in that prison was tired of waiting for death already.


	5. Chapter 5

The next day Feliciano decided to just lay it all out–tell Lovino about his past, why he was put on death row... everything. Maybe then his cellmate would trust him better and he could help more with unlocking Lovino's emotions in his art.

The only problem was how to tell him. And when. The only time they had alone was in their cell at night but that would be hours and hours from now. Feliciano couldn't wait that long. He was already getting antsy, trying to think of the best way to tell the older Italian without looking like an idiot or anything.

During breakfast, Lovino noticed his twitchy nervousness and, of course, decided to tease the boy about it.

With a hand under his chin and arm leaning on the table, he asked, "Is it that time of the month again where you get nervous and anxious because you want to get laid?" At this he licked his lips and cocked an eyebrow towards the other, but that had to have been just part of the tease. He was just a big tease.

Willing the blush away from his cheeks, Feliciano shot back at his companion. "Looks like the other way around," he weakly countered, knowing how stupid it sounded. His thoughts about what and how he was going to tell him about his past kept him from thinking of anything witty to reply with. Not that he usually had anything witty to reply with, in all honesty.

"Yeah right. Do I look like the kind of person so desperate that I'd actually want to get raped by the thugs in this place?" To be safe, he glanced around the room to make sure there was no one listening in on their conversation, afterwards returning his gaze to a smirking Feliciano. "Well, I'm not," he insisted.

"Well, I wouldn't say 'rape'," Feliciano replied, biting that smirk. "Though really, you and your 'pretty boy' looks could get you laid anyway." For the moment, he was glad for the distraction from his other thoughts.

And then for the second time he saw Lovino's cheeks burning a light shade of pink again, which of course had to have been from the mention of him being a "pretty boy". Lovino drew silent for a few short moments and returned to eating his breakfast, muttering a few sentences here and there with that blush still stuck to his cheeks.

For some reason, Feli felt a sense of triumph as he watched Lovino pick at his food. He allowed himself a little smile that he hid behind a forkful of his own food, basking in the fact that he got Lovino to blush instead of the other way around.

They had to go back to the rec area for now since breakfast time was over, and Feliciano was still as antsy as ever. He just wanted to get it off his chest as soon as possible, and then he finally got his chance.

* * *

><p>Lovino was sat counting a pile of cigarettes he had won from a poker game with some other inmates, dividing them into two piles–reserve and betting use.<p>

Feliciano scrunched his nose, not sure why the man needed cigarettes-he hadn't even seen him smoke once this entire time. "What's with the stash?" he asked, sitting next to him on the bleacher Lovino was sat on.

"Gotta get on the good side of these brutes somehow," Lovino replied with a grunt, not taking his eyes off the pile.

Feliciano fidgeted again.

"I have to tell you something, Lovino."

Those two green eyes darted up at once, though they seemed more playful than serious, and it made it all the more obvious that he wasn't serious when he asked, "You're gonna tell me that you're infatuated with me and my 'pretty boy' looks?"

At least he assumed that he wasn't being serious.

With a roll of his eyes and a sigh, Feliciano leaned back against the bleacher behind them, still fidgeting. "No. It's... about..." He took a deep breath, really unsure of how to word it. How could he word it? "It's about why I'm here."

Lovino continued being playful though. "You're here because of fate, right? It's like a bittersweet fairy tale of how you and I met in this Godforsaken place and that's why you're here. You're here to teach me what the meaning of life is and blah, blah, blah. I've heard it from plenty of people before. I don't believe in fate."

Caught off guard by the response, Feliciano just stared at Lovino, a little hurt by his accusation. "No..." he managed to squeak out, feeling his throat tighten with anxiety. Was he going to screw this up? Lovino was already not taking him seriously.

"I... I'm here because they don't believe in self-defense," he started slowly, his heart pounding as he brought his gaze down to his hands on his lap. "Some... men broke into my house and I... they attacked me when I came home so I fought back and ended up killing all three of them because I panicked and went into shock. The jury sentenced me to death row because of it... but it was self-defense. Self-defense and complete and utter shock."

He only just now realized the tears rolling hotly down his cheeks and he hurried to wipe them away, not wanting to make it look like an open invitation to pick on him.

But he felt arms wrap around him instead of the usual taunting tone. Out of instinct, he stiffened and turned his head to catch a side glance of the man hugging him, and it really was Lovino behind him and those were really his arms wrapped around him.

"Did I shock you just now?" he heard him ask quietly in a soft voice, a soothing and tranquil voice. Yet that only forced more tears to roll down his cheeks in spite of all the other prisoners in the room that were probably watching. It didn't matter anymore if the other men were watching.

Though he wished he could turn around and return the hug somehow, just to give him some sort of thanks in a way that can't be described in words. All he could do was lean back into those arms and let them be his asylum for as long as they could be.

Lovino's lips pressed to his ear as he whispered, "I'll tell you why I'm here too… you deserve to know after all."

And then Feliciano's sanctuary was taken away from him and he felt cold, the arms no longer wrapped around him to keep him safe or warm.

All they did now was have their touch linger on his skin.

* * *

><p>They had been taken back to their cell by now, Lovino sitting in his bunk as usual and Feliciano standing beside of their small metal desk. Neither of them spoke at all, afraid to break the silence between them. They were used to it anyways.<p>

Feli looked up and there he saw the other's hazel orbs locked on him, and of course he blushed because of that.

Then his cellmate shifted where he sat and looked to the floor, holding his head in his hands.

"I used to be somewhat associated with the mafia. I was in what I thought to be a very serious relationship with that girl… y'know. The girl with the daisies in her hair," he said.

"What do you mean "what you thought to be'…?" asked Feliciano.

"I'll get to that soon. Anyways, it's true that I had a special someone back home and she was practically my entire life… She was actually intertwined with the mafia and… having an affair with another man who was also part of the mafia.

"They got in a fight over something while I was gone at work and she shot him in the head. I don't know how they knew… maybe they had our apartment wired or something, I don't really know how… but they just knew… and so the mafia went after her for killing one of their men the same time I was coming home from work.

"They shot her as I walked through the door."

Suddenly Lovino had tears in his eyes, and those eyes looked painfully mournful and filled with regret. Despite the tears he continued his story:

"They told me that they would kill me too if I said anything and then they ran out and got away before the police came. Me being a fool, I sat beside of them and touched the guns, held them in my hands even as though it was all a nightmare and that if I shot myself, I would wake up and she'd be right there again, smiling and telling me she loved me…"

Tears began to make the quiet sounds of pitter patter on the cold floor as they fell from Lovino's chin. His voice went so quiet that even the sound of the dripping tears in the silent cell were heard over his murmurs.

Feliciano sat beside of him an hugged him just as he had done earlier that day. He patted his back and rocked him back and forth like a good friend, pulling the man's head into the crook of his neck to keep him safe. All he needed was to be safe in someone's arms for once.

Lovi's cries turned into sobs soon enough. "I-I thought she loved me and I w-was planning to propose to her s-so we could be together… f-forever… like in a fairy tale.

"At least… I thought I loved her…"

The sobs quieted down and it turned silent again. They both just watched each other and ignored the fact that they were entangled in each other's arms.

But friends were allowed to hug, were they not?

Feliciano reached up and tucked a tuft of dark red hair behind his friend's ear to keep it away from his eyes.

He had the most beautiful eyes.

"There's always someone out there that loves you, Lovi. It takes going to the depths of hell and back to find them, but… it's worth it," he whispered while tucking another lock of hair behind his ear.

"And is it fate that brings those two people together? I told you before that I don't believe in that kind of stuff."

At this Feliciano would have sighed and given up arguing with the man, yet he couldn't bring himself to do so. Instead he replied with, "Then I'll show you how fate works."

The silence settled in once more and the two watched each other quietly, Lovino having stopped his sobbing and Feliciano simply mute and waiting for the other to say something, anything. He had gotten him to talk all about his past and reasons for being a prisoner, so one short reply couldn't possibly hurt him now.

Right?

"I was going to shoot myself because I thought I couldn't live without her. I had the gun pointed to my head... but the police burst through the door and arrested me," Lovino mumbled.

"But right before I almost committed suicide... I gave her one last kiss, like one for when you say goodnight. Only this time she wouldn't wake up and smile again. That was the last kiss I had... with my dead lover."

For a brief moment, Feliciano didn't know what to say at all to that. But then the words tumbled out of his mouth without him even stopping to think.

"It doesn't have to be your last kiss, you know."

Lovino gave him a confused look, then an exasperated one. "…like I can have another kiss here in a jail full of men."

This time a blush found its way on Feliciano's cheeks all by itself. "Who says you can't?"

And again, without even thinking, the younger Italian leaned in.

Then Lovino did the same. At first he was hesitant, unsure of what to feel or do, but he couldn't help himself.

Until a guard smacked his baton across the bars of their cell, causing them to jump in start away from each other.

"You got a visitor, pretty boy," he said gruffly, opening the barred door and striding in with cuffs. Though instead of Lovino, he roughly grabbed Feliciano by the arm and forced the cuffs on his hands before pulling him toward the door.

"Wait, I'm not—" Feli tried to protest, struggling in his restraints.

"He's the wrong guy, asshat," Lovino exclaimed as he jumped up, attempting to help Feliciano get away from the guard but to no avail. He ended up having the end of that baton poised right in front of his face, all ready to be shoved into his nose.

"So says everyone else in this prison when it comes to their supposed innocence. Now back up or I'll get the orders to detain you," the guard spat, shoving Feliciano out of the cell and backing up with him, his eyes on Lovino the entire time.

Then the cell bars slammed shut again, leaving Lovino to be left alone on one side and Feli on the other. While one was being pulled away and the other gripped the iron bars, they stared at each other longingly, wishing, praying, and desiring to hold the other…

Feliciano forced the guard off himself and ran back to the cell door, brushing his and Lovino's lips together in one quick moment.

And then the guard snatched him away again, this time for good.

Once again, Lovino's safe place was taken away from him.


	6. Chapter 6

Feliciano's heart thumped wildly in his chest.

Part of it was because he was mistaken for Lovino and was now on his way to see whomever it was that came to visit him here in prison, but most of it was because of the kiss he managed to share with the older man.

A kiss.

He willingly struggled to go back to the cell and kiss Lovino.

The blush on his cheeks was undeniable and his lips tingled, as if the warmth of Lovino's own lips were still on them. However, the thump in his chest was aching—he was confused over his own emotions.

Did he even like Lovino that way?

Sure, he slowly grew attached to the man after he started to teach him how to draw. He was learning through Lovino's artwork just what was going on in his cellmate's head and daresay heart.

Not to mention, just before the kiss they were discussing Lovino's late lover. _His late lover_. Guilt flooded Feli as he was escorted to the visitation room. No doubt he was going to have to sort out his feelings after this and inevitably face Lovino—since they were of course cellmates.

At the moment, however, he was roughly shoved down into a chair placed in a booth with a window and a phone by his ignorant guard. He had never had any reason to come to this room before as he had no living relatives and virtually no friends. Now he was here for all the wrong reasons and staring straight into the dissatisfied, weathered face of what was definitely a Mafioso.

They each picked up the phone. The man was the first to speak.

"You're not the man I came here for," he said, voice thick with a regional accent Feliciano couldn't quite place and gruffness.

"The guards are stupid here," Feliciano replied flatly, trying so hard to control his emotions. While there was a piece of fiberglass between them, he was scared of this man—intimidated by him, more like.

The guy made a cross between a "tch" and a chuckle. "I take it you're his cell bitch then?"

Feliciano stiffened at those words, tightening the grip around the receiver in his hand. "I'm his cellmate, yes. The guard had a mix-up and forced me out here instead. They apparently don't take 'no' for an answer."

"Dumbfucks," the man muttered under his breath. He lifted his piercing, commanding gaze back to Feli. "I guess I have no choice but to make you a pigeon."

Feli's nose scrunched up, a little upset that he was currently being used as a tool. However, the fact that this guy knows Lovino gave him a little hope for some insight.

The grin on the man's face only served to make him uneasy, though.

"You tell _Piccolo Lovi_ that he has no chance of getting out because we've got him good," he said.

That whole statement sent shivers down Feliciano's back, making him bristle with growing anger. Lovino was set up.

The man leaned forward toward the glass, his voice dropping a little to sound extra threatening—at least to Feli that's what it sounded like.

"And tell him that his woman was a great lay," he mused, his grin practically splitting his face in half, showing off various gold teeth.

Feliciano dropped the phone and lunged toward the window in an instant, attempting to get through to the other side, anger completely thrumming through him. "You son of a bitch!" he screamed as two guards struggled to subdue him. "You set him up!"

The Mafioso laughed on the other side and Feliciano read his lips as he told the guard with him, "These murderers are all psycho," as the guard ushered him away from the booth.

It took everything the guards had on Feliciano's side to get him out of the room.

* * *

><p>Lovino was nervously pacing back and forth in their cell, fingers to the lips that were kissed just a few minutes before, cheeks aflame, and heart pounding hard. He was worried and flustered over Feliciano at the moment, confused with his own emotions.<p>

He asked himself why he leaned in to the kiss. He couldn't think of an answer. He asked himself why Feliciano had kissed him after being taken away by the guards and why he was so _determined_ to kiss him. Again, no answer. Then he asked himself what his feelings were for Feliciano.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard the familiar sound of Feliciano's voice as it came nearer to the cell. However, it wasn't the normal, soft, and helpful voice that Lovino was used to. It was harsher, angry—and filled with every colorful insult in the Italian language. He had never heard Feli like this—never thought he _could_ be heard like this.

His cursing cellmate was pushed roughly into their cell by two guards, stumbling and then whipping around to clutch at the bars of the closing door and hiss angrily at the two men as they uncuffed him through those very bars.

"You don't understand! That man is the criminal!" Feli was saying.

"Yeah yeah, that's what they all say," one of the guards—their usual guard—answered as he nudged his colleague and started to walk away.

"No! I'm telling the truth!" Feliciano cried after them, clearly exasperated by now.

Lovino's heart only pounded harder and faster. "Feli…?" he managed to get out, once the guards were gone.

He noticed his friend's shoulders tense up at his voice. When he turned around, all his previous anger seemed to have dissolved. What was left was a deep look of sadness, like he was about to apologize to Lovino.

"What happened out there?" he asked, taking a cautious step towards Feliciano.

The boy sighed and felt it to be almost pointless to tell his cellmate what had happened out there. The man was probably far away from the prison right now anyway, and even if he did tell him that he was set up, the guards would never listen to either of them. He was at a terrible stalemate.

So he shrugged his shoulders and climbed into his bunk without a word said. Lovino wasn't exactly too happy to hear nothing of an explanation from him, in which he demanded an answer for what happened and why he was screaming and cursing at the guards about this supposed criminal.

Again, Feliciano didn't respond. His eyes stayed locked to the ceiling above him instead, him being too afraid to tell Lovino because he didn't want another person to tell him that he was pretty much insane—especially someone as important as _him_.

Was he that important though? He didn't want to know the answer just yet.

Besides, even if the visit was for Lovino instead of him, there was no way he'd believe just what that bastard said. And he didn't want to hurt Lovino in the slightest; and he'd probably do just that by telling him what he was made into a "pigeon" to do.

"Why won't you tell me what happened? Is it because of the…" Lovino trailed off, but Feli knew exactly what he was about to say.

"No, it's not that. It's because I'm scared."

"Scared of what?"

Feliciano cringed. "Scared that you're going to tell me that I'm completely insane and that I've lost my mind, and I finally have someone that I can at least call a friend, so I don't want you to think I'm crazy like all the other people in my life. I'm not crazy. I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll lose you if I tell you, but if I don't tell you, then I might as well end up losing you anyways."

His heart felt heavier after saying it, instead of lighter. Lovino's touch on his arm made him jump and the tears he didn't know were forming threatened to fall. Feli looked down at the older man, who was using his own bunk to be level with Feli's eyes.

"You won't lose me," Lovino told him softly, though it was obvious he was also scared of what Feliciano was trying to hide from him. He was going to add on 'It's not like I can go anywhere' but thought against it, figuring it'd just make Feli more distant from him. "That visit was for me. You need to tell me what happened, Feli. Please."

Feliciano tried to avoid his eyes, those beautiful eyes. It would just be harder to say if he looked into them. "It was a Mafioso guy. Lots of gold teeth."

Lovino tensed, knowing just who Feli was talking about. Though, he leaned forward, urging his friend to continue.

Feli sighed again before continuing. "And that girl you were with…? Ah, well, she… she wasn't faithful to you. I mean much less faithful than you ever thought her to be. The guy that talked to me flat out said that 'she was a good lay'."

The last part of his explanation made Lovino's lip twitch and his nostrils flare as though he was about to punch the wall. And he was about to from the looks of it. His eyes turned cold and wary, glaring at a random spot on the wall, which could be where he was going to take all his anger out on.

He knew that she was unfaithful to him with one person… but there were more? Was she actually in love with him at all? He would have hated her if he didn't love her so much.

Lovino knew that he was still hopelessly in love with her, even after her death.

Feliciano figured he might as well get the rest of it out.

"They set you up, Lovi." It hurt to say it, to believe it. It hurt more to acknowledge that Lovino was completely innocent and here on death row than his own realization that he was here as well. And to add on, knowing that someone had this beautiful soul and didn't bother to stay faithful to him just made him pure angry... how could anyone do that to someone like Lovino? Sure he was sarcastic and crass at times, but he was so much more than that.

In the end, he was the one who made Feliciano smile.

But Lovino didn't want to hear any of it. He was sat in the corner of the room, gripping his head so that he could possibly get control of himself and his anger, yet that attempt bitterly failed. He began punching and kicking and screaming and letting all the hatred be heard, though it was not for her or the men who set him up so that he would be the one to blame for the deaths, but rather himself for loving her in the first place.

He hated himself for giving his heart away too easily.

Sobs broke out just as Feliciano got down from his bunk so he could somehow calm him. It was already too late to do anything because Lovino's hands were covered in blood due to his knuckles hitting the concrete. He may have even broken his hand, and that wasn't going to be good for his drawings at all, which could also result in him lashing out again.

Art was all he had left until his death.

"C-calm down, Lovi. We need to call the guards so you can be sent to the prison's infirmary. They'll bandage up your hands before the damage becomes too serious and you won't be able to use your hands for anything anymore, meaning writing or… or drawing." He paused and swallowed thickly. "No more punching walls, okay?"

When Lovino still remained unresponsive, Feliciano came closer to him and wrapped his arms around him. His trembling form tensed up in his embrace but eventually relaxed as Lovino reached up and clutched tightly at his friend's back, dampening the front of his assigned jumper with his sobs.

Feli closed his eyes. "I'll call the prison nurse here so you don't have to leave, okay?" he tried this time, rubbing soothing circles along Lovino's back. He barely felt the nod against his chest.

"Guard!" he called, lifting his head toward the bars of their cell.

"What?" the man grunted as he took his normal spot in front of their confinement, crossing his arms.

"We need a nurse in here. His hands are bleeding," Feliciano said, pulling out of Lovino's arms and holding up one of his companion's bleeding hands.

With a 'tch', the guard mumbled something into his walkie-talkie. "I'll take him to the infirmary then."

"No," Feliciano immediately cried. "Just bring the nurse here."

"Listen, buddy, I don't take orders from prison scum."

At this Feliciano felt his anger return. "Just… please, bring the nurse here?" he tried pleading, keeping his anger at bay this time.

The guard complied to his plead.

Feliciano never let go of Lovino, not once. He was too afraid to ever let him go.

* * *

><p>The nurse bandaged his hand up well enough, but she said that he wasn't allowed to use it for anything besides feeding and bathing himself for the next two weeks. Both Lovino and Feliciano expected this anyways.<p>

To Feliciano's surprise, Lovino wasn't as upset about it as expected—he'd only shrugged and said the two weeks would go by fast. But from how his eyes turned dull and lost their shine, Feli could tell that it hurt. Well, it was either he was hurt because he wouldn't be able to get out some of his emotions through his art or that he found out his lover wasn't his lover.

Maybe a distraction would work.

Once the nurse had left and they were locked up securely again, Feliciano attempted to bring up a different subject. It was hard though.

"So, um… about earlier… right before I left…" he started to say as he hung off the side of the bunk like he usually did, but then stopped when he noticed Lovino tensing up and curling into his pillow. He hoped he wasn't thinking that he meant the conversation about why Lovi was in here. Feli quickly tried to remedy that. "You kiss rather well."

Inside he was smacking himself over how stupid that sounded but he watched as Lovino relaxed just a tiny bit and his ears turn red.

"Thanks…" the older mumbled in response.

One of the usual awkward silences between them followed. Feliciano bit his lip and then lay back on his bed, contemplating how bad it was that he brought this up now.

"…why did you kiss me?"

Feliciano froze at the sudden question, blinking up at the cement ceiling above him. Then, his cheeks flushed and his heart started to beat a tad harder. "I… I don't know… I, um, guess I was in the moment…" He cringed, again finding himself sounding stupid.

"In the moment…" he heard Lovino echo softly below him, making him roll over and look down at his companion.

But Lovino wouldn't dare meet his gaze at all because it was obvious that he was still embarrassed from the remark about how he kissed. His cheeks were bright red, yet his eyes seemed weary and tired from the many tears shed earlier, and maybe that was why he wouldn't glance towards Feli's direction. He just really looked like he needed a hug, even if that meant he would be kicking and screaming while doing so.

After a few moments of Feliciano just watching him and memorizing his features, Lovi's lips barely moved as he mumbled a few inaudible words.

Feli scrunched his nose and asked, "What was that?"

Again, his reply wasn't heard.

"Lovi, what are you trying to tell me?" the boy whined, his head hanging lower from the side of the bed so his vision was completely upside down.

Lovino suddenly sat up and faced him, his mouth opening to say something yet nothing came out. He became frustrated with himself for not being able to respond and looked down towards his lap as his cheeks burned brighter.

Finally the words came.

"You're a good kisser too, okay?"

Feliciano nearly fell off his bunk, cheeks now dark red. "I-I…" he sputtered, unsure of how to respond. "…th-thank you," he finally managed to say, albeit softly.

"Yeah…" was the awkward reply.

For a moment they tried to avoid each other's gaze, both red in the face, hearts thumping wildly.

Then Lovino dared himself to kiss Feliciano again, in which he did.

It was quick and short and only a peck right beside of his lips because he had been too quick to pay attention to where his own lips landed. Not a second later did he wait to hide his face in his pillow, curl up in a ball again, and mumble a word of thanks.

Bright red and the spot next to his lips tingling, Feliciano lifted himself up and laid back on his bunk, trying to will his heart to slow down.

That went better than expected.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: **Here's to a big, big shout out to Talon as thanks for all the support and generous critiques of this fanfiction. Another big thanks for the recognition in the latest fic _Forever My Brother_, which was absolutely lovely by the way.

Sorry this hasn't updated in awhile—hopefully it'll go back to the regular updates now that summer is here. Thank you for all the reviews and here's to another chapter!

* * *

><p>The two weeks passed by quickly just as the nurse said they would. Lovino's hands had healed splendidly, and those two weeks without drawing at all must have triggered something in the right side of his brain, because he had improved greatly with his art.<p>

Once his hand was healed, Lovino was seen drawing practically every second of the day and even skipped a few meals just so he could spend that time to practice. Though he still wasn't exactly a professional artist, he was proud of himself and his drawings so far, and so Feliciano let himself be proud and complimented him whenever he could.

At one point, Feliciano could barely get him to talk because he was so entranced in his artwork. No matter how many times he said his name, threw something at him, or even blew in his ear, he wouldn't budge.

Though he wouldn't show it, Feliciano was, daresay, kind of hurt that Lovino wouldn't give him any attention at that point. And he was a little worried about Lovino skipping meals. This he blatantly showed.

"Lovino, you should eat just a little bit," he quietly urged one morning during breakfast. Lovino was, of course, doodling on a napkin.

Yet the man ignored him—he seemed to be too busy with his doodles to speak two words to Feliciano or at least recognize him. To this the boy began ignoring him too, pouting and leaving the cafeteria now that their lunch time was over.

Lovino stayed at his seat for another hour before he was escorted to his cell by the guards, shoved past the bars and into the tiny room with no real response from him at all. The guards left annoyed afterwards.

Tiredly, he walked towards his bunk, again not speaking any words to Feliciano, and settled there on the mattress, quickly falling asleep.

At suppertime, Feliciano remained silent as he leaned on one arm and picked at his food. He wasn't too hungry with his pent up frustration at Lovino, putting his stomach in knots and wrenching his heart. He wasn't used to having friends and having the one person he could truly call a friend ignore him so outright hurt like hell.

It took him everything he had to not cry himself to sleep that night.

* * *

><p>It wasn't as if Lovino was purposefully ignoring Feliciano. The shock of how he was cheated on and set up finally caught up to him and he just went into a catatonic state of depression. The only way he could channel his thoughts and feelings was through his artwork, which had taken a great turn for the better since his break from it.<p>

So he sat there at the desk and stayed glued to it for another few days, taking his time with a drawing of his previous lover lying in a field of flowers. The only thing that was wrong about the picture was the bullet hole through her forehead, the last image of her that he had seen before he was taken away to this place.

Feliciano didn't bother to disturb him anymore, and even if he tried he wouldn't be able to answer him. The shock left him mute anyways, so trying to explain to the boy wouldn't get him anywhere.

He didn't feel like eating anything either. Food never seemed to sound appetizing, rather it gave him some nausea just thinking about eating anything. All he had the past since his hand healed was water and sometimes a handful of bread, because he knew that he would have to eat something if he wanted to stay alive.

Now and again he questioned if he really did want to stay alive.

One night his hand was hurting too much for him to move it as well as his back aching with a horrible pang from how he sat cramped over the desk all the time. He decided to lay in his bunk instead with eyes wide open and hands clasped under his head.

Feliciano, in his bunk, noticed the movement below and sat up, leaning forward to hang over the edge of his bed like he always did—well, before Lovino started ignoring him. The younger man felt genuinely surprised that his cellmate wasn't drawing for once.

Maybe now he could get his attention.

"Lovino," he called loud enough for Lovino to hear. Unfortunately, the man didn't budge.

With a sigh, Feliciano paused to think for a moment. "...hey, Lovino, do you think pasta has feelings?" Surely a stupid idea would at least get the usual vanilla insults out of the older Italian.

Unfortunately it didn't.

This time a huff left Feli's lips as he flopped over onto his side, pouting. That was when he noticed that Lovino had left his newest drawing on the desk of their cell. He blinked. If Lovino wasn't paying attention at all, maybe Feliciano could get a peek at just what his friend was working on this whole time.

Carefully he climbed down from his bunk and crossed over to the desk, peeking over his shoulder to see if Lovino was paying attention or not.

His eyes were open, but he didn't seem to care at all that Feliciano was going to look at his drawing. It was possible that he _wanted_ him to see it, and Feli was just about to take his chance.

He saw the girl and immediately recognized her from Lovino's previous drawing about a month ago, but the bullet hole was something different. She was smiling and had her hands clasped together atop of her torso, overall a peaceful aura that contrasted with the gunshot at her forehead.

With everything that the boy had gone through, he wasn't at all disturbed by the picture, instead curious as to why Lovino would draw this in the first place. Was he angry at her? Well of course he was, but how angry was he?

Did the picture even _mean_ he was angry at her?

"Lovino, what does this mean...?" he asked without thinking, forgetting for a moment that Lovino may not even respond. He turned to look at him, startled that he was looking back. So he was paying attention... but he didn't seem to be mad that he was looking at his work. He just looked... blank.

Feli held up the picture so Lovino can look at his own artwork. "...this is her, isn't it? The... the girl you were in love with."

He could see the slightest tensing of Lovino's muscles, giving him his answer.

The boy took a few steps towards Lovino's bunk and sat beside of him with the drawing still in hand. With the man's shoulder only mere inches away, he had to resist resting his head atop of it in one of those comforting big brother moments in a way—somewhat brotherly anyway.

"Lovino," Feliciano softly started, "will you talk to me?"

Lovino lulled his head to the side, lightly biting his lip. How could he tell Feli that he couldn't make his voice come out?

After a few moments of their familiar awkward silence as he observed his friend and the drawing in his hand, Feliciano cautiously reached over and touched Lovi's cheek that was turned from him, to get him to look at him again. "Hey... can you talk?"

Lovino averted his green eyes from those two auburn ones in spite of him having to face Feliciano. His cheek was held in place by his hand, though it would have been simple to gingerly turn his head to the side. He could have done it if he wanted to, but he… didn't.

He opened his mouth to say something before closing it again, realizing it wasn't going to work no matter how hard he tried.

Feliciano understood in an instant.

Then the guilt settled in. If it weren't for him telling Lovino about his lover and the setup of her and another man's murder, then he would have never gone through this shock and suddenly gone mute. He didn't deserve to ever have to go through such events. God knows he's already been through hell and back.

In a matter of seconds, the younger man's arms were wrapped around the frame of the elder, hugging him and holding him and trying to convey all that guilt and sorry for putting him through even _more _hell. Feliciano didn't care if he was going to be pushed away or not—he could understand if Lovino was mad at him too-but if for this one moment he could express how truly sorry and sympathetic he felt, then that would be enough for now.

He didn't have much longer to live anyways. These few minutes were the same amount as an average person's day. And those moments with Lovino he cherished dearly.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, fingers clutching tightly at the fabric of Lovino's prison jumpsuit. "I'm sorry that you have to go through with this and that I had to be the one to tell you and break you. I'm so sorry..." He hid his face in Lovino's shoulder to stop the oncoming sob that attempted to burst out of him.

Slowly, Lovino raised his arms to hug Feliciano in return, hiding his own face in the boy's neck. He couldn't cry. No tears would come. Instead, he tried his best to keep Feliciano from crying—what else could he do? He was tired, he was broken hearted—he had to keep the last good thing in his life from sharing his misery.

In the end, Feliciano ended up crying himself into a deep sleep, tangled in Lovino's arms on the older man's bunk. Lovino was still awake, however; he watched Feli as he slept in the dim light of the night time lights of the prison, taking in his features for the first time. He was so young, so innocent-looking...

Cautiously, Lovino lifted his hand and brushed back some of the boy's hair from his face, his fingers lightly trailing down a still-flushed and stained cheek like he was observing a priceless treasure. There were so many things he wanted to tell this man, let him in, let him take care of him in spite of the limited time they had left in this world, but he couldn't do that now—not yet at least. He had to get his voice back.

Without even thinking, Lovino leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the corner of Feliciano's lips.

And then he fell asleep the most content he had been in weeks.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** We're so sorry that this is late. We hope that this chapter will make up for us being so late. Thank you for all the reviews too and now here's chapter eight!

* * *

><p>It was oddly bright in the little cell when Lovino woke up in Feliciano's arms. Through the little barred window came the rays of sunlight that shined down on the two prisoners as though it was Mother Nature telling them to wake up and rise for the upcoming day. From what Lovino could see through the opening, it was indeed going to be a beautiful summer day with lots of sunshine and blue skies—all those happy little things he'd forgotten about since his death sentence.<p>

After a few minutes of lying there on the mattress with Feliciano curled into his side, Lovi decided to sit up and stretch his arms over his head due to the long night of sleep keeping his muscles rigid and stiff. A moment later he was gazing at Feliciano's relaxed sleeping face, admiring the way the sunrays just so happened to make his hair shine an almost golden color. He brushed his fingers along the boy's cheekbone carefully and softly so as not to wake him from his peaceful slumber.

He was about to open his mouth and say something before he remembered that he couldn't really speak at all due to the shock from before, so instead he bit on his lip and watched Feli's chest rise and fall as he slept.

Just then, as if he could feel the movement through his sleep, Feliciano slowly woke up, his eyes gradually opening but then squeezing shut again as soon as the light hit them. He groaned, starting to roll over but with practically no room on the bed for two people, he ended up hitting the wall beside them as soon as he started turning.

Confused, he peeked his eyes open again, squinting at the wall he had bumped into before lolling his head to look at Lovino beside him. Immediately last night came back to him and his eyes grew wider and his cheeks glowed brighter as he stared into those hazel eyes that were unusually bright and calm for once.

"Lovi?" he managed to hoarsely whisper, looking around at where they were—remembering that it was Lovino's bunk that they fell asleep on.

He was momentarily puzzled when Lovino didn't respond to him, but soon enough the memory flashed before his eyes and he understood. Feliciano still received a soft smile anyways, one that made his heart clench horribly because it was just so sweet and kind and he wanted to gaze at it forever.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled softly while averting his eyes away from that smile that should have never been meant for him—he was the one who had caused him to be in shock and therefore lose his voice in the first place. He already missed the sound of it terribly.

He wasn't expecting Lovino to move in closer to him and press a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth. Feli's cheeks grew redder, a hand coming up to touch his lips that were now tingling after the warm touch of Lovino's own.

Lovino shrugged a shoulder sheepishly, a small, shy smile on his lips. He wanted Feli to know that he forgave him.

And Feliciano heard loud and clear.

After a few moments of trying to savor this closeness between them, the guards finally rang the breakfast bell and came around smacking the bars of the cells with their batons to get everyone awake. Quickly the two scrambled out of bed, hoping the guards wouldn't see them together in each other's arms, and stood to attention as soon as their feet hit the floor.

They didn't speak the entire time for breakfast. Either was thinking about the night before—how they fell asleep in each other's arms and the kisses they had shared. They needed a little time to think over their feelings for one another though it was quite obvious something was blooming.

Something… but they didn't know what. Love? Adoration? Admiration?

It was true that they felt something for each other but just what it was was unclear. There was definitely nothing sexual—at least, not yet. The little kisses they had were more out of pure emotion than lust.

So just what was it?

During their breakfast, Feliciano did all he could to get Lovino's voice back. He even tried scaring him, but all that got out of him was a sort of squeaking sound that ended up making the younger Italian fawn over him for a few minutes.

This also ended up in Lovino shying away from speaking or making any sound voluntarily for that matter.

That didn't keep Feliciano from giving up, however.

"Can you at least try and say my name?" he tried once more, pouting after Lovino had splashed his face with a little milk to get him to stop fawning over his little squeak sound.

Lovino gave him a look, hoping he could convey that this wasn't going to work.

After that, the two of them simply sat there and ate their meals without speaking, both of them too disheartened to say anything else (or try to say anything on Lovino's part). Lovino didn't really have the stomach to eat more food, so he used his napkin as his paper and doodle on that for a good while. Feliciano didn't bother him either and let him be in his own world for the time being—Lovino seemed at ease when he was drawing anyways, and he couldn't take him away from that.

Lovino was still working on the napkin drawing by the time lunch time came around. He wouldn't let Feliciano see it even when they were having rec time before their second meal that day. Feliciano only hoped it wasn't anything relating to the set-up, as he didn't want Lovino to build up the negative feelings again when he could help him through it.

Come to find out it wasn't.

When Lovi finally looked away from the drawing to take a bite of his much-needed food, Feliciano managed to get a peek at what he was sketching.

It was him.

But it wasn't the usual portraits that he claimed to draw as his practice or the facial structures he studied. It was far from that to be exact. For those drawings that he was able to get a peek at, he was smiling and clothed—they were all innocent pictures of him and would never question why he was drawing him in such a way. Why would he need to?

But in this drawing he saw himself bare naked with his arms sprawled over his head, what he assumed to be drool at the corner of his mouth, his lips bruised and swollen and wet, and a pair of someone's hands at his groin that seemed to be stroking his—

Feliciano had blushed a million times before, be it because of someone embarrassing him or something that he saw or heard that was embarrassing, but never before had he blushed so bright red to the point that from his shoulders up he was flushed. He couldn't look away from the picture either, which only made it worse when Lovino decided to turn towards him at that very moment.

The silence between them was the most awkward one yet.

"Lo—"

"Well well, what do we have here?"

Both turned as soon as the gruff voice hit their ears, ending up with a not-so-very-nice looking prison inmate grinning in their faces. He towered over them, overweight and covered in tattoos, and as rough looking as his voice. Along with him were three other inmates, all of varying sizes and colors, but all of them had the same grin on their faces.

The one who had spoken snatched up the napkin with the erotic sketch, showing it off to his little gang of friends.

"Looks like little pretty boy's an artist!" he announced with a laugh. Then he leaned in to Lovino. "Tell me, pretty boy, can you draw me like one of those French girls?"

"Leave us alone," Feliciano interjected, trying to get the napkin back from the man.

Then his attention turned to Lovino who was frozen solid in his seat, looking out at a point in the distance that led to nowhere. He couldn't use his words to get out of this situation and it frightened him knowing that, knowing that he couldn't coax them not to hit him or Feliciano. He didn't even know how to stop someone from hitting another person on account that he usually faced such situations alone. His pupils turned dilated and heartbeat went rapid when another memory hit him smack in the cheek at the same time as the inmate slapped him right out of his seat.

He heard Feliciano scream his name, but it was already too late. Lovino fell to the ground and all of the lunchroom turned their attention towards him. He had never felt so utterly humiliated before, except for those times in school when he was bullied because the others were jealous of his looks. The bullies there called him "pretty boy" too.

Life never really changed in that way.

Here he was again, facing death on either end in which it could be death by a prison fight or in about another year. Honestly at that moment he would have preferred dying in the prison fight rather than counting down how many days he had left.

The inmate took a few steps towards his spot on the ground and kneeled down low enough so only Lovino could hear him. "Pretty boy…" he whispered with such disgust and pity it made Lovino's heart clench, "I'm going to let you go this time. You go run off now with your boyfriend and enjoy fapping off to your little… drawing."

He was… being let go. The man felt so much pity for his broken heart that he was going to let him live another day. Lovi couldn't tell if it was merciful or a punishment.

The inmate then tossed the napkin at him and strode away with the rest of his gang, never looking back after that. Relieved, Lovino stood up on his own two feet, looked towards Feliciano, and took the napkin in hand, quietly returning to his seat as though the red mark on his cheek was a hallucination.

The teasing didn't stop though.

Just before dinner that day, they were in the showers per usual for their schedules, but also like usual Lovino and Feliciano were a few stalls apart from each other.

This time, they went after Feli.

The young Italian was cautiously taking his shower, making sure to keep a good eye over his shoulder. He was worried about Lovino, thus facing his way just in case, but it wasn't Lovino that the gang of inmates was going after this time.

Regardless of him keeping an eye out, Feliciano was suddenly surrounded by the thugs from lunch, backing up into the corner of his stall. His heart pounded just as it did during the incident with the napkin sketch as he stared back into the amused eyes of the big guy with the tattoos.

"I noticed you were the one on that napkin," the guy said, his voice teeming with obvious intention. He placed a hand right next to Feliciano's head, leaning in a bit. "I take it that means you're pretty boy's bitch, huh?"

"I don't kn-know what you're talking about," Feliciano stammered, looking for any sort of way to escape, but finding none. The guy was just too big to move past.

"Oh I bet you do. You look too fresh to be experienced. I bet you're a virgin," big guy teased, using his other hand to run a fat finger down Feli's cheek.

Feliciano tilted his head away, his heart about ready to beat out of his chest.

"We don't really have ways to… help ourselves, since we're into women, but you look like one enough so why don't you just ditch pretty boy and come with us, hm?"

"No–" Feliciano attempted to move past, but was pushed back into the wall again, making him wince as his shoulder took the rough hit.

"I don't take 'no' for an answer, _queer_," came the growl-like reply right into his ear.

He barely got Lovino's name off his lips before he was turned around and shoved against the wall again.

Hearing Feliciano's voice practically scream his name, Lovino's head snapped up immediately. His lips shaped into Feliciano's own name but nothing came out, so he grabbed his nearby towel and threw it around his waist, rushing to Feli's stall.

The sight he came upon was horrifying.

Feliciano was struggling in the grip of two big-built men as they forced him to stay still in order for the big tattoo guy to… to…

"Stop!"

The suddenness of his own voice coming back in a shout surprised even Lovino as everyone turned to look his way, even those who were not part of the almost-raping that was going to happen.

"L-Lovino—"

Lovino—his heart pounding harder than ever—stared into Feliciano's terrified, surprised eyes when the younger Italian spoke, then he lifted his gaze at big guy, his own eyes hardening in anger.

"Let him go," he rasped, his fists clenching. His hazel eyes were embed with pure abhorrence once his glare had settled upon the bigger and taller man, and that man stared right back with the same hatred and loathing.

"And what are you going to do if we don't, pretty boy?" the man snarled, his lips twitching into a wicked grin that was meant to taunt Lovino, telling him that he couldn't do anything even if he tried to stop them.

While Lovino was growling at him and planning out his next argument, the guy decided to shorten their fighting by throwing a punch his way, but Lovino dodged it easily and stroke him in the side with his fist that sent him to the floor. The tables had turned now, the inmate being the one on the floor and Lovi being the one above him. He rather enjoyed seeing the bully finally being the one to end up being beaten.

He jumped on top of him and sent punch after punch into him, not even noticing the gash in his head from when he hit the tiled floor. There was now blood on Lovino's hand as well as the floor, and soon there was a puddle leading into the drain.

The other members of the gang were in shock for the first few moments before they finally made their way toward the fight, punching and kicking Lovino in every which way. Bones cracked and more and more blood spilled everywhere… Feliciano could only watch in horror, huddled in his stall while trembling.

The guards broke up the fight after watching it for a few minutes, Lovino and the other inmate being dragged away. Feliciano was able to catch a glance of Lovino's broken body as he was taken out of the showers. He had a large number of bruises on his sides and chest, which meant that he probably had a few broken ribs now. His lip was cut and bleeding, eyes red and swollen, and a gash in the side of his head.

All in all, he appeared to resemble a rag doll that had been tossed around too many times, contrasting to the usual sturdy appearance he kept at all times. Feliciano felt his lip tremble as he watched him disappear out of sight and arms wrap around his shaky frame.

The other inmates seemed to be too worried to get in trouble to bother with him any longer to his content. Everyone else soon left the showers too, leaving the poor boy alone.

Thankfully the shower continued to stay on so no one could hear Feliciano sobbing or question why there were so many tears rolling down his cheeks.

* * *

><p>It took almost two months for Lovino to get out of intensive care.<p>

In that time, Feliciano had a guard with him everywhere he went to prevent more fights from breaking out. Even though the guard was with him, Feliciano had never felt so lonely or broken in his life.

Almost every night in that month he huddled in the farthest corner from the cell door on his bunk, hugging his knees tightly and crying into the poor excuse for a pillow he had issued each inmate. He'd flinch whenever someone would touch him and he stayed quiet except for responding to the prison guards and the inmates who served the food.

Every day he asked for any sort of indication that Lovino was recovering but no one was nice enough to tell him, in spite of how pitiful he looked.

Finally, though... finally Lovino was released.

Feliciano was sitting at the desk, mindlessly doodling squiggles and lines, when the cell bars opened and two guards ushered Lovino into the cell. It took a moment for Feliciano to even register that someone had even come into the little cell but when he did, he nearly fell over in the chair.

He stared at him for a long time as though he thought that the man in front of him was an illusion, a dream, anything besides the friend who had fought for him when no one else would. He saw some scars on his neck and cheeks from the fight, but his eyes were unchanged. They shined brightly at him—excited even—and held so much kindness and compassion.

Lovino took a step forward and made Feliciano flinch, in which he took that step back again and pouted.

"I'm sorry for leaving you, Feli," he apologized, though there was no need to. _He _was the one who saved him. _He _was the one who stopped the gang from raping him. It wasn't his fault that it ended up in him being sent to intensive care, even solitary confinement for awhile as punishment.

"I-it's not your fault," Feliciano replied.

The guards left them and closed the cell again, leaving the two alone for the first time in a couple of months.

Feliciano slowly sat down onto the bottom bunk—Lovino's bunk—and rubbed his arm in awkwardness. Lovino sat down beside him, albeit wincing a little (surely from his ribs still healing), and reached for Feliciano's hand, only to have his friend to flinch under his touch.

Lovi frowned, looking up at Feliciano, and his heart fell when he saw the slight fear on the boy's face.

"They didn't... no one hurt you again when I was gone, did they?" Lovino asked, suddenly feeling that old anger flaring up again.

Fortunately Feli shook his head, but he was looking down at his lap. He was afraid of anyone touching him, even Lovino. Even though he knew that Lovino would never hurt him.

"Feli..." he heard Lovino softly say, the gentleness of his tone coaxing him to look up into the man who saved him.

Seeing the kind, apologetic look on Lovino's face made Feliciano's lip tremble and before he knew it he was crying again, a hand across his mouth as muffled sobs and "I'm sorry"s tried to force their way through his fingers.

Lovino took this chance to pull him into his arms, and no matter how much Feliciano wanted to hide again, he couldn't pull away from him. He buried his face in his chest and continued whispering muffled apologies to him, in which Lovino would hush him and press soft kisses to the top of his head. He wished for more of those comforting kisses since he never received such kindnesses from anyone besides maybe his parents when he was younger.

Those kisses were just so compassionate and caring… and warm…

They both quieted after awhile, Lovino rocking him back and forth gently to keep him calm and content and Feliciano sniffling and then letting his puffy eyelids finally shut. He heard Lovino humming quietly—an old lullaby perhaps—and let out a deep breath.

The humming stopped. The entire room became quiet besides the barely audible sound of them breathing and their rapid heartbeats.

Then one of them finally said it.

"I think I'm in love with you."


	9. Chapter 9

"I think I'm in love with you."

It was quiet for a little longer after the confession as Feliciano took it in. His heart felt like it had leapt into his throat and was starting to keep him from breathing.

…he hadn't expected Lovino to say it. He hadn't expected anything like that _at all._

The confession repeated itself over and over again in his head, making his cheeks heat up considerably and his arms tighten around Lovino. The longer they sat there in each other's arms, the faster Lovino's heart pounded out of his chest as anxiety settled in.

He could tell that Lovi was unsure of his confession now by the way he was tensing up and slightly shaking, and Feliciano's fingers clutched the fabric of Lovino's jumpsuit tighter.

"Me too," he finally said, afraid Lovino might start thinking he was rejecting him when in reality he was just scared, "with you."

In the next moment there were two soft lips pressed to his temple, only painting Feliciano's cheeks an even darker red than before. It was really all so sudden that this happened and he had no idea what else would occur in the next few minutes now that they had both stated their love for each other.

He prayed that no one else was listening to them lest Lovino get into another fight and be taken away for a repeated two months. He had barely made it through those first two months without him there to be his means of sunshine in the cold, lonely prison and would never be able to manage two more months without him.

Lovino's lips brushing against his ear snapped him out of his worried thoughts, and he hid his face in the other's chest to hide his rosy cheeks and save himself a few minutes of embarrassment. True, he was already embarrassed with how much affection he was receiving after two months of him not touching anyone, but he cherished it anyways, even leaning in to those lips for more sweet kisses.

He really hadn't expected any of this to happen, but what he didn't expect the most was Lovi's tongue sliding against the arc of his ear, forcing a soft moan out of Feliciano's throat. He wasn't used to any of this affection and love and it made him horribly, horribly flustered to the point that he had to push the man away so he could recollect himself and his thoughts.

His breathing had hastened to where he was now panting, tiny beads of sweat had collected on his forehead due to how much he was blushing mixed with Lovino's warmth, and his hands were shaky as they stayed on the other's shoulders to keep him at arm's length.

And he wished he could say something to make the situation better, but his voice wouldn't allow him to do so. They both stayed sat on the bed for a long time no longer holding each other but more so calming themselves down from that one moment of desire.

Feliciano hadn't even been looking at him after pushing Lovino away so he wouldn't have to see the hurt look on his face. He was just so new to all of this that he hadn't thought of the consequences of his actions—he just did what he did and that was the end of it.

He didn't have much experience when it came to relationships and loving another person _like that _either, especially when it came to making love someone. At least he thought that Lovi was planning on making love to him after licking his ear so seductively—

Finally, he lifted his head to glance at him, seeing not hurt in his eyes but amusement. Was Lovino actually amused by his being flustered? Well, of course he was. It was Lovino for crying out loud. Yet those hazel green eyes never failed to melt his heart, even when they were teasing him a little.

"I-I'm sorry for pushing you away like that," he began his apology, "but you made me so flustered that I didn't know what to do so I had to push you away—"

"Feli, it's fine." Lovino ruffled with his auburn hair and laughed. "You're still a virgin and I completely understand that so I won't do anything to you. I just couldn't help myself since I was locked up for months without you or that picture around to keep me satisfied."

"…I never said I was a virgin," was all the boy could reply with, too embarrassed to mention the part about the picture, or himself for the matter.

"Vibrators don't count," he retorted with that silly grin on his lips. And there he was again making jokes like he always did, making all the bad things in life somehow disappear into thin air by just being so silly.

Instead of laughing or blushing like he normally would at one of Lovino's teases, Feliciano began crying because he was so happy that he had him back—this time forever. His eyes blurred with tears as two arms wrapped around his shoulders, gently rocking him back and forth like they always would when he would start crying.

Feliciano happily settled in that comforting embrace before resting his head on Lovino's chest, a smile managing to form at the corner of his lips.

"I'm here, Feli."

* * *

><p>The next couple of days were more of a time to get reacquainted with each other, especially for Feliciano as he had grown that fear of being touched when Lovino was taken away from him. Lovino had to slowly ease Feli into letting him casually touch him without making him flinch; it was a little hard but he managed to do it and eventually Feliciano was so comfortable with just Lovino touching him that he started cuddling against his side whenever they'd work on pieces of art.<p>

In about a week, Feliciano started to habitually climb down from his bunk and join Lovino in his own, curling up against him and sleeping in until dawn when Lovino would have to unfortunately wake him before the guards came to get them up so that he had enough time to get back into his own bunk.

Lovino didn't mind it at all. The first night he ended up watching Feliciano sleep most of the night, taking in all his features and memorizing all of them like he had that one night they first slept together. While he was on pain medication the two months he was away, his face was fuzzy in his mind. Lovino was glad he had a moment to make that image clear again.

And that image of him had never been more beautiful. His cheeks were always dusted pink whenever he would glance at him, which was always adorable to see since he could tease him about it and make those cheeks burn brighter. Feliciano's amber eyes shined so brightly with pure happiness and adoration that melted Lovino's heart, especially knowing that all of that happiness and adoration was because of him. The most beautiful thing about him was that smile—though it was always shy and small, it was as loving as ever.

Sometimes Feli's hands were shaky because of the anxiety and nervousness whenever they would have to leave their cell, but after twining their fingers together and kissing his knuckles, he would seem at ease again. Sadly, Lovino would have to let go of his hand before the guards came to open their cell door. They soon made it a habit of lacing their fingers together and letting go before leaving the cell.

In all honesty, this was the happiest either of them had ever been in their lives.

There was little trouble from the thugs as they were moved to a different schedule than they were to keep any more trouble from happening. A guard accompanied them almost at all times now, mostly so that they can keep an eye on Lovino with his ribs still healing.

That didn't bother either Italian for it kept the stress off of their shoulders and they didn't have to worry about being teased.

Another plus was they were in stalls next to each other in the showers, so Lovino could keep an eye on Feliciano and be there for him immediately in case anyone tried to mess with him again. Unbeknownst to Feliciano, Lovino would sometimes study his body as he showered—only every now and then—to be able to remember his form when he would draw.

Feliciano caught him once and shooed him back to his own stall, covering himself with his hands until it was time to leave the showers. That one time Lovino was caught, he smirked and winked at him before catching another glimpse of his groin and standing back in his own stall. Of course Feli was embarrassed by his doing, but it was better than having those thugs looking at him again.

It was weird, but, it was the most comfortable they had been in the prison. They even forgot that they were on death row, they were so happy with each other.

They went back to their art lessons, though it wasn't Feliciano teaching Lovino anymore than it was him just drawing with him now. Lovino wasn't shy in showing his nude drawings of Feliciano anymore and instead used them to see that adorable blush on his cheeks again and have him sputter with flustered embarrassment. It was so worth it. However, they stopped bringing any of their art outside of their cell just in case someone new would give them trouble.

On occasion, Lovino would draw himself sometimes too, since he knew his body better than anyone else, and show those drawings to Feliciano just to get a reaction out of him. It resulted in more blushing than it would with any other drawing shown to him. The only time Feli had even seen him naked was during their shower time, but he would always try to pay attention to anything else that wasn't his crotch, and again, he wasn't experienced much when it came to those parts of being in a relationship.

Neither really knew if they were in an actual relationship now nor did they bring it up. They rather enjoyed each other's company the most and not need bother with those types of things. It wasn't like they could post their new relationship status on Facebook for the whole world to see.

At night when they were safe in their cell, Lovino would sneak a few surprise kisses to his cheeks, forehead, temple, hands, neck, lips—whatever part of his body he could reach. Although no one was there to see those kisses, the both of them could feel their heartbeats go a little faster as well as their cheeks being set aflame, though it was mostly Feliciano who was nervous about kissing him so publically.

He would turn away most of the time and avert his eyes towards the ceiling so he wouldn't have to face that teasing grin. A second later Lovino would pull his lips away, Feli would look back to see what had happened in case he had accidentally hurt his feelings, and then Lovino would take that moment of surprise to kiss him on the lips. It worked every time and never failed to fluster him.

And though he would hide out in his bunk for awhile to make sure his heart had calmed down, Feliciano would always somehow end up in Lovino's bunk by morning, clutching onto his jumpsuit with his head tucked right under his chin. In the morning when Lovi would wake up, he had to resist the urge to coo or dote on him lest he be too loud and wake up the other cellmates.

Lovino decided to try something new one morning while the younger was still asleep in his arms. Most of the time when he woke him up, he would only shake him awake and notify him of the guards' upcoming arrival, but this time he couldn't bear to do that to him with how peaceful he looked in his slumber. It wouldn't be fair to wake him up in such a cruel manner when he just looked too endearing and adorable for his own good—

He lifted his head up and watched him, eyes mapping out the curve of his nose and those thick eyelashes before finally gazing at his lips. He'd imagined them swollen and red and wet a million times before, be it in his dreams or when he was daydreaming, but in this moment they seemed so soft and alluring and especially tempting.

Feliciano shifted in his sleep a little, his fingers clutching onto Lovino's jumpsuit tighter as he mumbled something about paint and shoes. This ended up making his lips set in a slight pout and part a little as those lashes fluttered slightly, but he stayed asleep much to Lovino's luck.

With that, he leaned down and brushed his lips against his cheek, suddenly too afraid to try to wake him up with a kiss. It was his original plan, but he couldn't bring himself to do something like such as that just yet. No, instead he planted his lips on the soft skin and pulled away, whispering in his ear, "Wake up for me, Sleeping Beauty."

The boy stirred in his arms and blinked his eyes open before a yawn caught hold of him, making him lay back a little and stretch. He let go of Lovino's jumpsuit and rubbed at an eye as he registered his surroundings in his daze. When his open eye settled on Lovino, he sleepily smiled, letting his hand drop and his other eye open to take in the early light casting soft shadows on Lovino's face.

"Morning…" he whispered, wrapping his arm around Lovino again and pulling himself closer to hug him.

Lovino gladly accepted and returned the hug, pressing another kiss to Feli's skin, this time on his temple, and smiled himself. "Good morning."

They laid like that for a couple of minutes more before Feliciano spoke up again, sounding more awake than before. "Do I have to get back in my own bed?" he asked softly, not wanting to move from where he was against Lovino's frame and tucked under his chin.

"Yeah… unfortunately," came Lovino's reply while he traced lazy circles on Feliciano's arm.

The pout on Feliciano's lips was the cutest thing ever to Lovino.

"I hope one day we can just sleep in with each other without having to worry about the guard getting us up," the younger said without thinking. When he realized what he said, it was already too late. The smile was gone from Lovino's face and there was a sad, longing in those hazel eyes that were so bright the past couple of weeks.

"Lovi…" Feliciano whispered, reaching up and cupping his cheek. "I'm sorry, I said it without thinking."

Lovino turned his head to kiss the palm of that hand, closing his eyes. "It's okay. Even if we don't get that, at least we get to spend every moment together until the end."

While this made Feliciano's heart feel heavier, it also gave him a small hope that they could at least maintain a relationship and closeness up until they were sentenced to die. That was more than either of them could ever ask for.

"I love you," Feli said softly, leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss to Lovino's lips.

"I love you too," was his answer as Lovino nuzzled his nose. "Now get up in that bed before the guards come or I'll tickle you."

The smile returned to Feliciano's lips at the cute threat and he climbed his way out of Lovino's arms and up the ladder to his bunk but not without getting another kiss out of the older inmate. It was just in time too because the breakfast bell shrilled through the prison just a couple of minutes later and the guards came by smacking the cell doors with their batons and opening them.

He watched Feliciano climb back down and walk out of the cell as he did every day when the guards came for them. It was the same routine that would continue until their last day, and though he was able to forget the death sentence for awhile thanks to his cellmate, it wasn't enough to erase the fact that he really was going to die in a little over half a year. They were _both _going to die and he couldn't forget that.

But for now, since he couldn't do anything at the moment nor did he have a plan to escape his upcoming death, Lovino followed behind Feliciano in line and squeezed his hand when the guards weren't looking. "I love you," he said through the subtle gesture.

He smiled when he felt those fingers squeeze back.


	10. Chapter 10

It was about a week later when Lovino decided to climb into Feliciano's bunk for once since the view at the top bunk was less accessible than on the bottom bunk. That meant that the guards wouldn't see them together up there if they just so happened to walk by, which was rare anyways. But just to be safe, they hid themselves up on the top bunk and cuddled there.

Feliciano immediately curled up to him, a content smile on his face and a yawn to boot. It was reflex now every time they laid down together. It was like they were magnets.

Lovino did as he always did and winded both of his arms around his frame, one hand placed on the crook of his back so he could pull him closer if needed and the other at his hip. It was practically routine when he kissed his forehead and then his lips, those lips pressed firmly and knowingly to his as though he was never going to tear their mouths apart ever again.

Every time it made Feliciano's heart flutter, knowing that he was able to share these moments with the most important person in his life—what remained of it. He always gladly and gratefully accepted each kiss as if it were their last (which with their current position in life, neither knew when that last kiss would be), and returned each and every one with one of his own or a loving nuzzle. Sometimes he felt too tired to do anything but hug Lovino close, but he would always allow a couple of kisses before he fell asleep during those times.

For a long time they just stayed like this, holding each other and giving each other long kisses, Feli's fingers clutching the sleeves of Lovino's jumpsuit as if letting go of him would mean him disappearing forever, and he was definitely not ready to let go of him. He would never be ready to release him so long as they both lived.

The only thing that changed was how they laid themselves on the bed with the occasional shift of their arms or legs curling around one another to bring their bodies closer. Their hands never left their original positions as they were much too comfortable with feeling each other like this.

But the most delightful part of the kisses for Lovino was Feliciano's soft, delicate lips against his own. He'd never imagined him being this good at kissing, the way his breaths slid across his cheek and how he moved against him so... naturally. It was like they were meant to fit together like this.

It was probably because of that natural feeling of being so casual with each other now that Lovino just absently started to actually move his hands this time. The one on Feli's hip moved to the small of his back, pulling him closer against Feli's front, before it began traveling up and bracing Feliciano for a slow roll onto his back. Lovino kissed him more fervently with the change of position, laying himself halfway onto Feliciano's body while doing so.

This new position wasn't as comfortable, though Feliciano wasn't about to tell him to get off and leave him alone because he still loved that loving feeling of their lips close together, that breath tingling his skin, and those hands running over his back made him feel closer to Lovino. He could at least trust him with this much affection.

Then Lovino became daring and much more feverish than ever before. He slithered his hand between their hips and began massaging his groin, pressing into the sensitive skin and expecting him to start moaning, mewling, or pulling his lips away to drawl out his name and lean into his touch. He expected him to beg for more, but that didn't happen.

He didn't make a slight noise of pleasure at all.

Feliciano's little sounds of surprise and eventual protest were muffled against bruising lips as Lovino kept on, and he found himself breathing heavily through his nose to just catch his breath. His chest felt heavier with Lovino lying atop him and his natural instincts kicked in, starting him into what would become a panic attack. Flashbacks of that day in the showers came back to him, memories of the tightness in his chest as the thugs held him down with great force, thoughts of when he felt like he couldn't breathe because of an oncoming panic attack and fear… finally he used a bit of force to push Lovino off of him, gasping for breath as his arms trembled under Lovino's unsure weight.

And Lovino assumed it to be a joke, like Feliciano was trying to deny the both of them that pleasure that would supress the many months of not being touched or stroked or anything. Well, on Feli's part it was years because he was still a virgin and the thugs had somehow known that without even knowing him or who he was. They just assumed—everyone seemed to assume he wanted to be touched.

So Lovi started sucking on the nape of his neck instead of pushing himself off, because all he really wanted to do was touch his warm skin, strip him of the jumpsuit so it could just be him as Feliciano with no reminiscence of the prison for a few hours, and then melt away his heart into the night as they made love.

He absolutely wanted to make him his own before their time was up, the last bit of electricity that charged the clock that tracked his life being used on the electric chair that would end it.

But his request was denied yet again as Feliciano pushed him off with more force this time.

"Lovi, please don't," he heard the younger man whisper, those hands pressing firmly into his shoulders to keep him away, shaking a little. "I'm not ready to go that far."

Naturally, the first thought that came to Lovino's mind was the virgin thing again. "Not ready to give up your virginity yet?"

For some reason that evaded him, Feliciano didn't put on that cute little shy blush he usually gets, but glared at him.

"What? You… you are a virgin, aren't you?" he asked, not so sure of his assumption anymore.

Feliciano pushed him further off of himself and sat up, putting space between them. "Get off my bunk, Lovino."

"Feliciano, wh—"

"Get. Off."

"But—"

"You just have to take a crack at that, don't you? Well, guess what, I'm not a virgin. I'm just scared. Scared that you're going to do this to me and then end up being called out to your execution, so just get off of my bunk if you're just going to make virgin jokes."

As he said this, Feli kept his eyes down, refusing to look at his almost-soon-to-be lover.

Lovino wasn't having it. Instead of listening to him, he made it out to be an act of Feliciano playing hard to get, even after waiting two months to see him again. It was ridiculous to act this way in his mind. They weren't going to have as many opportunities in their short life span, so why not take advantage of what time they had left together when it could be just them–no jumpsuits, no guards, and no prisoners.

Just bare skin, loving kisses, and a dash of moonlight from their small window.

So he rolled his eyes and murmured to him exhaustedly, "If you're so worried about me dying, then give me these last few moments to have you to myself. I saved you from those thugs, didn't I? You practically owe me."

That last sentence struck the final chord for Feliciano, his patience broken and his fuse lit.

"Owe you?" he repeated, anger already seeping into his tone. "I _owe_ you? Here I thought you saved me because you cared about me, but no, it seems like all you wanted was a little piece of ass. Couldn't let those thugs claim it, could you?" he spat, backing himself away from Lovino into the corner of his bunk he was most familiar with all those nights he was alone and crying, wondering and praying to God that Lovino was okay. "You're disgusting, Lovino. Get out of my bed before I kick you out."

The only moving Lovino even did was rolling himself onto his stomach, arms crossed beneath himself. "Feliciano, don't be so ridiculous! I was only joking about you owing me. And hey, now that you're steaming mad, we could have some passionate hate sex. I hear that's pretty good too."

The more Lovino joked about the situation, the more disgusted and angry Feliciano was. If Lovino wasn't getting out of his bunk, he would just go to Lovino's for the night.

"You know what, Lovino?" he started as he shoved Lovino out of the way to get down from the top bunk. He stopped on the little ladder to look up at him with molten amber eyes full of anger and hurt. "Fuck you."

With that, he hopped down and threw himself onto Lovino's bunk, trying so hard to not cry into the poor excuse for a pillow.

He heard Lovino groan above him and move again so that his head was hanging over the side of the bunk as he himself had done before Lovino had been taken away. For a second he wished Lovi wasn't here so he could fume by himself for awhile, but that horrid thought was tossed away for good a second later. He didn't want him to be taken away again so he could spend nights by himself and a tear-stained pillow.

"All I wanted was for you to forget life and kiss me," Lovino whispered before returning to laying on his back with his eyes glued to the ceiling.

Feliciano didn't both addressing him, but instead clung to the pillow with the older man's scent, the same scent that had seduced him into those warm arms— _No_, he had to stop thinking like that. He had to stop thinking about what could have happened if he had allowed himself to be touched, if they had continued melting into each other until they were only lovers, no longer prisoners of false trials and ill fate.

This time he allowed himself to cry silently into his almost-lover's pillow.

Lovino wasn't exactly taking the tension between them well either. Thanks to the darkness, he was able to let silent tears slip down the sides of his face without anyone bothering him as to why he was crying. The reason he was crying didn't matter anymore because the reason became pointless when he heard Feliciano crying.

And maybe—just maybe—his jokes had finally gone too far.

* * *

><p>For the first time in weeks, Feliciano and Lovino didn't bother with their morning routine of holding each other's hands and giving each other a kiss before going out of their cell to breakfast. In fact, Feliciano was the first one to the cell door, not even bothering to wait for Lovino to follow after.<p>

Lovino didn't follow after him either and Feli didn't know why, though he was both glad and upset that he didn't. The reason why he stayed behind was to make sure his eyes were no longer red and puffy as they had been the entire night. Feliciano didn't know that he had cried too, the entire night in fact.

The boy wanted time to himself. He knew it would be too awkward between him and Lovino if they just casually went to breakfast and ate together. No, he couldn't let that happen right now. He didn't want to face Lovino, didn't want to hear those jokes he made, didn't want to see his grin, his beautiful hazel eyes that sparkled whenever Feliciano was reflected in them—

He had to mentally slap himself to stop thinking about him as he quietly asked for a guard to accompany him to a lone table. He even made sure to not be anywhere near Lovino in the line for food and to be faced away from him at his table in the corner.

Even though he made sure he wasn't near Lovino, the older Italian could still see him and could see those tear stains and red blotchiness on those cheeks that always made the younger man look like a Teddy bear, and those dark circles around those big, wondrous eyes. Again, guilt churned in Lovino's stomach, making a small choked sound release from his throat. Luckily he had just entered the cafeteria so no one could hear it.

No one even paid attention to him.

He never felt more lonely in his life.


	11. Chapter 11

**We are terribly sorry for how long you guys have waited for this chapter. We've been quite busy with other things and Sarah has been writing her own fanfic (**_**D'Angela**_**, found on our page), so we hadn't gotten around to writing chapter eleven. So to make up for it, we made this chapter extra long and filled with so many goodies we hope you'll like. Thank you for your patience and enjoy! -Char**

* * *

><p>For an entire week, Feliciano gave Lovino the cold shoulder. Every morning, he'd practically run out of the cell as soon as the guards opened it, leaving Lovino behind to awkwardly shuffle out like a kicked puppy doing the walk of shame. Every day during lunch, Lovino was sat in the corner as Feliciano ate at another table guarded by a prison official to protect him—from Lovino. And every night, Feliciano would go straight to bed without kissing him goodnight or hanging his head off the side of his bunk with that big goofy smile as he said goodnight. Their art lessons stopped, but Feliciano was deep in a project so Lovino was happy that Feli was at least being himself a little bit while he ignored him and gave him an extra cold shoulder.<p>

Lovino was regretting joking around with the boy, knowing in retrospect that it was a serious matter—Feliciano was a virgin who had a near-rape experience and Lovino had mercilessly teased him about not putting out for him. Lovi had never felt so ashamed before this.

How he longed to hold his boyfriend securely in his arms until the morning light again, giving each other gentle kisses and just talking for a couple of hours at a time…

Finally he couldn't take it anymore and during recreational period, he decided to confront Feliciano about the situation.

Spotting him sketching on a napkin under the bleachers, Lovino made sure no one was keeping an eye on him or around before he headed right to his young boyfriend.

"We need to talk," he outright told him, taking a seat next to the younger Italian on the ground. He could just see every muscle in Feliciano's body tense up and he watched with a pain in his heart as he scooted away from him and hugging his napkin art protectively.

Feliciano didn't reply—only drew his knees up close to his chest and turned his shoulder away from his beloved. This made Lovino sigh and he reached out for Feliciano's shoulder, making the boy jump and hit his head on the bleacher seat above him. He cried out in pain, dropping the napkin and the pencil before clutching the top of his head.

Lovino gasped and immediately rushed to pull Feliciano into his arms, to shush what looked like an oncoming sob, and kiss the pain away, but Feli scrambled away from him and hurried away from the bleachers to get a guard to take him to the infirmary, leaving behind his sketch.

With another sigh as he clenched his outstretched hand, Lovino cursed himself. He plopped back down and dropped his head onto his knees, groaning. But then he caught sight of the napkin Feliciano had been sketching on and he lifted his head, reaching out to pick it up. On the dirt dusted paper he recognized a light, messy sketch of himself holding a key and Feliciano behind a wall, curled up and alone. Lovino's heart clenched, especially upon seeing at least five locks chained to that wall on Lovino's side and one on Feliciano himself.

He realized that he would have to woo him somehow and only in a way that would win his heart over, but that was obviously going to be difficult since he ran off without allowing him even one word that could have swayed Feliciano his way. But he couldn't handle the cold shoulder anymore or the sleepless nights without the soft warmth beside him that would assure he had at least some safety among the prisoners.

Now it didn't even matter if he was able to have sex with him or not because all he wanted from him was some reassurance that they were going to have something of a bright future together before their executions. He just wanted those kisses again before the time would come when he could start counting how many he had left on his fingers.

"I miss you, Feli," Lovino whispered despite knowing that Feliciano was already long gone and would never be able to hear him. He left the bleachers after about twenty minutes of plotting out a plan for his next move.

A few hours later, they were to be in their cells again and so they were, Lovino sitting on his bunk by himself and Feliciano hunched over the metal slab of a desk with an ice pack over his head. He was drawing too, of course, so he was at least in a peaceful state of mind, from what Lovino thought due to the many past experiences of being around Feliciano was focusing with the right side of the brain—the more romantic side too.

Maybe Lovino could try being romantic. He wasn't really good at it but he knew a few cheesy things from watching the movies as a kid. He couldn't just whip up a drawing for Feliciano so maybe a faster, more direct approach would work. The guy always got the girl after they shared a moment listening to a romantic song, right?

Rolling back onto his back, Lovino rested his head on his hands, and—feeling super cheesy—started mumbling the lyrics to a song he could remember from the outside world.

"_Hey there, Delilah, what's it like in New York City…_" he started, not entirely singing but adding a little bit of tune to his words. "_I'm a thousand miles away but girl, tonight you look so pretty, yes you do…"_

He turned his head a little to watch Feli's response and just as he thought, the boy had stopped moving, tensed up a little in his seat. Rolling a little onto his side, slowly, he continued, keeping his voice soft so only Feliciano could hear him.

"_Times Square couldn't shine as bright as you," he sang, propping his head up on his hand. "I swear it's true…_"

His heart fluttered when Feliciano turned his head a little to somewhat look over his shoulder, and Lovi carefully got up from his bunk, stepping slowly towards him so as to not alarm him.

"_Hey there, Delilah, don't you worry about the distance, I'm right there if you get lonely, give this song another listen. Close your eyes; listen to my voice, it's my disguise_," Lovino sang, watching as Feliciano's breath sped up, and he reached out for him yet again. "_I'm by your side_—"

Suddenly the night bell rang, making both men jump, and soon the guards were shouting for everyone to get into their bunks and sleep.

Feliciano, still breathing heavily, gathered up his work and put it in the little drawer attached to the metal desk that also housed a bible, and pushed away from the desk, brushing his arm against Lovino's.

The touch electrified the older man and he closed his eyes, breathed in the scent of his beloved as they stood closer than they had been in a week for just a moment. It didn't last long as Feliciano hurried up the ladder to his bunk, but Lovino lingered in the familiar feeling, thanking God that he was allowed it, even if Feliciano practically pushed him away again afterwards.

When the lights went out in the prison, Lovino went to bed feeling a little less lonely that night.

* * *

><p>The next day, Feliciano still wouldn't speak to him, but at least waited for Lovino to get out of bed before they went out to breakfast together, and he didn't ask for a guard to watch over him at his own table. Instead, he sat with Lovino and even if he didn't say a word to him, Lovino was more than relieved and happy that he managed to get through to Feli a little last night.<p>

He even let Lovino sit next to him as he sketched under the bleachers during rec period, not recoiling or pushing him away or even running away. The bump he got from these very same bleachers didn't seem to be hurting him anymore as he didn't have the ice pack on his head, but Lovino was still a little worried about the injury. However, he was scared to try and get Feli to let him look at the bump or ask him if it was still hurting as he didn't want to ruin this improvement between them by giving Feliciano another reason to pull away from him.

Although, what surprised him the most was when they were in the showers after that recreational period. He wasn't sure if he was hearing things, but Lovino heard Feliciano's soft voice—the voice he missed hearing so much—gently call his name loud enough for the older Italian to hear him over the rushing water of the shower heads.

Lovino turned around to face the boy, only now seeing how much thinner Feliciano had gotten in the past week. He seemed so… so delicate standing there naked under the near-burning spray of the water, so weak. It broke Lovino's heart realizing that the younger man had obviously stopped eating all of the food he received and was not getting a proper night's rest with the light circles around his eyes.

He did this to him.

Lovino broke him and God was it just now registering in the southerner's mind.

Resisting the urge to just take him in his arms and tell him he'll take better care of him, Lovino cleared his throat quietly and answered Feli's call. "Si, Feliciano?"

Those normally bright eyes looked up at him from their dark beds before immediately averting toward the ground. "…I'm sorry."

If there was ever a chance to break Lovino's heart into even finer pieces…

"I-I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I was scared and I cussed you out."

No, no, no, no, no.

Lovino was supposed to be apologizing, not the other way around.

"I—"

Lovino cut him off as he stepped into his stall, resting his hands lightly on top of Feli's shoulders that tensed a little under the sudden touch. Lovi rested his forehead against the wet, mat of auburn hair atop Feli's head as he spoke himself.

"You have nothing to apologize for," he told him softly. "I was the one in the wrong and I tried forcing you, and instead of respecting you I insulted you for not wanting to go that far. And I hurt you doing that. I hurt you and I can't… I can't be sorry enough for ever doing that to you. I don't think I could ever make up for hurting you that way, Feliciano. I'm so sorry and I love you so so much." He didn't notice the tears running down his cheeks until his breath hitched.

Feliciano turned around then and wrapped his arms around Lovino's waist, completely disregarding the facts that they were sopping wet, naked, and just a stall over there was another prisoner taking his shower. He rested his head against Lovino's chest and said, "I love you too. And I forgive you… on one condition."

Lovino looked down at him with a look of confusion, looking back and forth between Feliciano's amber eyes after the younger had lifted his head to look at him. "What is it?"

"You kiss me."

It only took Lovino by surprise for a split second before he cupped Feliciano's face in both hands and tilted his head a little, leaning in and pressing a firm, loving kiss onto his wet lips. Oh how he missed these lips and this closeness and good God have their kisses always felt this warm and amazing—

He pulled away for just a moment to keep from getting dizzy, resting his forehead against Feliciano's and gently brushing their noses together as he looked into those amber eyes finally shining brightly once more, before closing his own eyes again and pressing another, more sure kiss onto those supple lips.

They both ignored the stares they received from the other prisoners as Lovino's mouth traveled lower to Feli's jawline where his teeth grazed soft, dripping wet skin. Feliciano tried not to moan as his lover's lips attacked his neck lest one of the other prisoners get the wrong idea and start thinking that it was an open invitation for an orgy.

But dear God, the feel of Lovino's wet lips against his own was too savoring and delicious to say no to, so he didn't. He stood pressed against the tiled wall and allowed his mouth to be tantalized with the sensation of Lovi's tongue darting between his lips, igniting a fire deep inside of his chest that burned throughout his entire body to the point that even his fingertips were tingling.

Then the bell rang again and both men nearly jumped out of their skin, yet were too breathless and flustered to move apart from each other besides pull away their lips. The other prisoners left the showers and acted as if they hadn't been staring at them for the past ten or so minutes, but none of them said a word to Feliciano or Lovino. Meanwhile, even the guards held their backs towards them for once as though they respected some means of privacy.

All they said was, "Save that for your jail cell pornos, idiots." Lovino was a little happy that they hadn't called them something worse and more offensive, but it cautioned him to keep their intimate moments a little more private rather than in full view to all of the prison.

"We should go back to the cell now," Feli murmured as he rested the palms of his hands on the older man's chest.

Lovino nodded and started to turn to get his towel but Feliciano took a firm grip on his arm. Bringing his gaze back onto his boyfriend, he tilted his head a little and gave him a questioning look.

Shyly, Feliciano stepped in, blushing, and whispered, "I had time to think about it this past week and I… I think I'm ready to go that far with you now."

And before they knew it, they were in Feliciano's bunk, only their underclothes on as Feliciano lay carefully atop Lovino while he repeatedly kissed him all over his face, but mainly those addicting lips.

Lovino hated how much lighter Feliciano felt and how almost breakable he could be, so he took care to be as gentle as he could, his fingers curled in that luscious auburn hair to keep him down enough to kiss him deeply. For a few minutes they stayed like that, getting comfortable and only kissing with the occasional run of their hands along each other's bodies.

"I missed you, Feli," Lovino mumbled quietly after releasing him from their kiss.

Feliciano could feel the guilt panging at his heart, but before he could even try to apologize, the older man was pulling him in for another kiss. This one was much more demanding and burning with hunger than any they had ever shared before, though the effect of it was wickedly intoxicating, as if they were both being pulled into a drug-induced, dream-like state.

They forced themselves to pull away in order to catch their breath, the two men gasping for breath and recovering from the aftereffects of that kiss. Lovino's lids were heavy now, but Feliciano could still see the desire clouded in his green orbs as well as his own reflection staring back.

This time Lovino took Feliciano's hand and placed that hand on his chest before guiding it down the slight curves of his body and over the smooth skin of his abdomen. His fingers brushed over the lining of Lovino's "V" and tickled the hairs of his happy trail until finally he was touching fabric that withheld the older man's throbbing groin.

It was a little embarrassing and, of course, made the boy's cheeks burn brighter, so he buried his face in Lovino's neck where he could regain his train of thought. God, he felt so warm and that husky scent of his skin was delicious, but for the moment he didn't know what to do with himself or to the man underneath him.

"This is what you make of me. I become like this because of you and it makes me need you so much that my mind becomes foggy," Lovino said in a breathy, ragged voice that brushed against Feliciano's ear and made him squirm. "So, please, touch me."

"I don't know how," Feli admitted, his voice muffled against Lovi's neck.

There was a tongue sliding against the rim of his ear now, and because of it he let out his own hoarse moan and clenched his fingers around Lovino, receiving a sound that seemed to imitate a purr.

"I'll guide you through it," Lovino whispered into that ear, making him shiver.

Soon enough, the older Italian was guiding his soon-to-be lover's hands along his now-naked erection, letting those hands go once the boy had a good idea of what to do, his eyes slipping closed in pleasure. Feliciano twisted and squeezed his hand around the thick appendage, drawing soft moans and gasps out of Lovino, giving him the reassurance that he was doing a really fine job.

Afraid he was going to come, Lovi reached out for Feliciano's hands again, softly urging him to stop for a moment. Feli complied, not wanting to do anything wrong. But he couldn't do anything wrong; Lovino was guiding him, teaching him the way. And Lovino was a great teacher.

Feli was scooped up into his stronger arms, sitting him on his lap. Lovino leaned in and nuzzled his nose against Feliciano's as he carefully pulled down the waistband of his underwear, revealing his own throbbing erection. The cool air of the prison cell made him shudder as soon as he was pulled out of his confinement, followed by a warmer shiver when Lovino took his cock in his hand and gave it a couple of pumps.

"I never knew you weren't circumcised," Lovino said, not meaning it in a demeaning way, as he slid it down away from the head and ran his thumb under the ridge beneath it. This caused any protest out of Feliciano to turn into a sharp gasp, and then a moan as Lovino pressed his own erection up against the length of Feli's, rubbing their heads together.

"Don't worry; I'll make you feel good all the same," the older said, nudging his lover's nose again to give him a kiss while he pumped their lengths at the same time.

And that kiss was another powerful one that had the wet muscles they called tongues tangled together and sucking each other. This was only a fine addition to the already immensely satisfying friction from the pumping of their erections, though Feliciano did everything in his power to not tear away from that wet kiss and just grind himself against Lovino—that would be too forward for the shy boy to ever do.

He couldn't grab onto anything either besides the older man's skin now that they were left bare and oh so exposed to the point Feliciano didn't know what to do with his hands. But how could anyone ever be able to resist touching the smooth skin covering Lovino's chest or those broad, tanned shoulders that signified a history of long days in the sun without a shirt and honestly, he wouldn't mind seeing him shirtless every second of the day—

Goodness, those thoughts were making him dizzier. If he kept thinking like that, he would end up coming in no time.

And Lovino was near his climax by now, that was a given, but he didn't want to say anything because what if he scared off Feliciano when he could not tell him and end up seeing the boy's chest covered in his cum instead? That sounded like a much more pleasing idea than anything else.

He heard Feli mewl loudly this time, his body tensing against Lovino's and Lovi's hand, chest, and neck now dripping with the younger man's seed. There was no stopping the smirk forming at the corners of his lips as he pulled his mouth away to see Feliciano's face in the middle of his orgasm, in which his eyes were stuck in a dream-like state with those heavy lids and his mouth was wide open while he let out silent sounds of pleasure.

"I-I'm sorry I came so fast," Feliciano gasped out as he rested his head down on Lovino's shoulder. He was already panting so much and clinging to the older man's broad frame as though that was his lifeline.

"Shh, it's fine. It's perfectly alright," Lovino assured him, peppering his temple in kisses and not bothering to wipe off his hand. Instead, he reached around to Feli's backside, pushing his underwear down further. "That actually helps."

Feliciano's brows knitted together in confusion. "Help with wh—" He was cut off when Lovino pressed a finger into his entrance, coated with his own cum, making him whimper and cling tighter to his boyfriend. The feeling was foreign to him—yeah, he wasn't a virgin, but he wasn't a virgin in the heterosexual way. He had never been taken by a man.

And as if Lovino had heard his thoughts, the older man smiled against his ear and whispered, "So you really are a virgin." Before Feli could protest this time, he continued, "I don't mean that to be demeaning. I only mean to say I'm proud I'm your first."

The words made Feliciano blush darker than he already was and he buried his face in Lovi's neck as he was stretched and thrust into by the elder's fingers. It actually felt… kind of nice after the initial sting and strange feeling.

Lovino's lips brushed against his ear to whisper quiet words of love and all the things bad in the world seemed to disappear for Feliciano as his cheeks flushed a deep red. He wished he could do the same to Lovino—make him blush or feel good the way he was making Feli feel so swelled with absolute lust and desire.

Out of curiosity as to what would happen he gave the nape of his boyfriend's neck a wet kiss, his tongue slipping past those lips to slide up the edge of Lovino's neck. The effect of it was a moaning Lovino who seemed to be now tilting his head back and thrusting his fingers harder than before, making Feliciano have to bite down on his shoulder to keep from screaming his head off.

He nearly did lose it when Lovino brushed his fingertips along a certain spot inside and even though he didn't mean to touch it, bolts of pleasure raced through Feliciano's body causing him to shudder and see stars and (yes, yes, _yes_, _finally_) moan out Lovino's name. Determined to make that happen again, Lovi retraced his 'steps' and curled his fingers against the small bundle of nerves again, earning a sharp gasp and a buck of the hips out of his lover. He had to bite back a proud grin.

"L-Lovi, y-you're making me want to come again," Feliciano whispered shakily, wriggling his little ass against Lovi's fingers, making him slide his fingers in deeper.

While he didn't mind because it was a wonderful feeling, he felt bad that Lovino hadn't had his own orgasm yet and here Feli was on the verge of a second. Luckily, Lovino complied with pulling his fingers out only to line up his thick cock, the tip kissing his prepared entrance.

A second passed and he was already on his back with his head rested on the pillow, Lovino on top of him, of course. Then there was a sharp stinging that made him see flashes of white, so his head tossed to the side to bite the pillow. Feliciano wished Lovi had at least warned him because dear God, did this hurt like a—

"Just relax," Lovino whispered into his ear, giving his cheek several reassuring kisses. "Hold onto me if you need to—I don't mind claw marks to the back either." He winked, getting a blush out of Feliciano, and continued pushing deeper into him slowly, carefully.

Feliciano wrapped his arms around his torso, hands finding their way up to Lovino's shoulder blades. For a moment he was afraid to dig his fingers into the taut skin because he didn't want to draw blood but that thought was thrown out the window as soon as Lovino thrust himself the rest of the way into his body—again without the warning but at least Feliciano had something to claw at this time.

For a moment they laid there, panting, each getting used to the feeling of either filling or being filled, before the stillness started to feel uncomfortable and drive Feliciano crazy. With a slightly hoarse voice, he told Lovino to move and boy did he move.

Those thrusts rattled the entire bunk bed to the point the sound of its clinking against the stone wall echoed through the halls, but, God, Feli never knew that being filled to the brim with his lover's thickness could actually feel this… _this_—

Along with the metallic echoes came Lovino's name soon afterwards as it appeared that Feliciano found his voice again, loud and husky and begging for mercy, but that one spot inside of him being hit made him retaliate and drawl out that name again.

It didn't matter that the inmates on either side of and across the hall from them could hear their loud love-making; nor did it matter that a guard was just down the hall, probably listening to them as well—neither Italian was going to stop any time soon. They had needed this—they had needed each other for weeks now and dammit, they were going to do this all night if they wanted to.

Even though he knew he was probably bleeding from this being his first time and even though he figured he was going to walk funny in the morning, Feliciano wanted more—so much more—and he made it obvious to his lover as he began to rock back onto those thrusts, meeting each of them with a thrust of his own.

Their skin smacked and slapped and clouted together repeatedly in the most beautiful of rhythms. Lovino loved to hear that sound and it only enticed him to move himself faster and urgently with no stopping until they were both sweaty messes of limbs tangled together. The sound he favored the most, however, was those pants and mewls and every last noise that ever came past Feliciano's lips.

Shaky breaths brushed against wet skin and made their bodies burn with passion. They moaned, scratched, clawed, rolled, pushed, mewled, rocked, and set out a sweltering fire in their groins that was oh—_oh_—so close to bursting.

And it was Feliciano who came first between them—literally. His second orgasm ripped through him, ribbons of milky cum splattering his and Lovino's bellies, his lips forming the shape of an "o" but never quite getting the sound to come out. Inside his velvety walls began to spasm, constricting tightly around Lovino's cock as it continued to ram into him again and again and again—

–Until the added friction pulled Lovino's own orgasm out of him, causing him to slam himself deep inside before stilling his hips and spilling all of his seed there.

It took Feliciano a moment to get his vision back in focus, his pulse to stop beating so loudly into his ears, and to catch his breath, fingers loosely clutching bloodied and scratched-up shoulder blades.

He looked at Lovino apologetically when he saw the blood under his fingernails, but was only given sweet kisses of forgiveness to his forehead. When some strength returned to him, he leaned up and returned those kisses, lightly pressing his lips to the scratches along the top of Lovino's shoulder and collarbone before he gave out and had to rest back down.

Lovi weakly pulled his placid erection out from Feliciano's stretched ring and tried to stop himself from crushing the boy underneath him due to the sudden loss of strength thanks to that blissful orgasm. His head fell to the pillow as well and he had to force himself to stay awake just to watch his lover for another few moments.

"I love you," he managed to mumble against the fabric of the pillow beneath him. His hazel eyes looked exhausted now, but there was some sort of… spark behind them that wasn't there before—a beautiful light that gleamed and glowed with love for Feliciano, and that in itself made his heart clench again.

Feliciano had a similar look of his own; however, it was only there for a moment before he closed his eyes, snuggling up to his lover. "I love you too," he whispered in return, his arm draping across Lovino's side and hugging him closer to him, wanting him to feel how fast and hard his heart was beating for him at the moment.

It took a little while but Lovino managed to pull the sheet over the two of them and scoop Feliciano into his arms again, but it was worth the extra effort as watching the boy fall asleep with his head on his chest had become Lovino's favorite thing to see right before falling asleep himself.

And he was so thankful to be able to see it again, if only for just a moment.


	12. Chapter 12

**We're so sorry for the wait! We hope that this special birthday chapter-although short-makes up for it. Hope you enjoy! And thank you for a year of Prigione!**

* * *

><p><em>Tap tap tap<em>.

…

_Tap tap tap_.

The sound of the guard's baton smacking against the bars of the cell roused Feliciano from his slumber first, making the boy aware that he was tangled up with Lovino in the sheets they soiled the night before.

Lifting his head from Lovino's bare chest, Feli slowly blinked open his eyes, squinting in the dim light of the morning sun. His hair was a mess, sticking out every which way atop his head, subtly fanning out in tufts like a peacock's plume as he moved, obviously as a result from their first time making love the previous night.

Upon feeling his lover's weight shift on top of him, Lovino stirred, inhaling deeply through his nose as he stretched himself awake. His eyes fluttered open and he was greeted by the sight of Feliciano's sleepy, adorable face looking down blearily at him. Immediately he received one of those precious smiles, causing a smile of his own to form, and Lovino reached up, brushing back some of that unruly auburn hair.

"Buongiorno, bello," the elder whispered, continuing to play with Feliciano's hair.

"'giono," Feli mumbled, lowering his head to peck Lovino's lips.

The guard smacked his baton against the bars again, the sound more demanding than before. With a sigh from each of them, the lovebirds sat up, instantly regretting doing so.

Both groaned, just now realizing how sore they were from the night before. The scratches Lovino bore lightly throbbed with a sting and Feliciano's lower back and hips resisted each and every movement.

By the time they were out of bed and in their jumpsuits again, the other prisoners had already left their cells and gone to the cafeteria where they were eating breakfast. The guard had to personally escort the two men to the cafeteria (and grumbled the entire way there.)

He also made sure not to make eye contact with either of them and seemed to be a little flustered by what he had to see that particular morning.

With a hand rubbing his eye while a yawn stretched across his face, Feliciano made sure to inconspicuously link his fingers together with Lovino's as they walked. He leaned on the older man's shoulder and tried to lull himself back to sleep to take a two minute cat nap on the way to the cafeteria while Lovino tried not to fuss over how adorable his lover's sleepy face was in the light of morning.

That morning Feliciano had three cups of coffee.

His back was still aching from the night before so he was doubled over on the table, his head on his arm and a tight grip on his coffee cup. Lovino sat across from him and kept messing with his hair to try to get it back in order, but that helped little and even made it more of a curly muss.

It wasn't just Feliciano's back that was throbbing from the previous night. Lovi's was practically painted red from the many scratches he'd received and it stung every time he moved. They looked like they were suffering from a hangover.

The worst part about it was everyone's staring at them. It seemed like almost everyone in the prison had heard their "bedroom adventure" last night, making the two feel even more embarrassed.

When they were finally allowed to take showers after breakfast, neither of the two wanted to come out of the amazing heat of the massaging-like water, spending more time letting the spray work out the soreness in their body than actually cleaning themselves.

Lovino's shower was a bit more difficult with the scratches Feliciano left on his body but when the guards shut off the water, he groaned a few curses, trying to bargain with God to let him stay in the shower a little bit longer. When that didn't work, he reluctantly grabbed his towel and dried off, absently wandering into Feliciano's stall to make sure he was okay.

He wasn't surprised to see his young lover leaning against one of the stall's walls, quietly asking for "just a few more minutes in this heaven". Lovino chuckled, rolling up his towel and whipping Feli on his bare ass to get his attention. His grin widened when Feliciano yelped, grabbing his abused cheeks, and whirling around to give Lovino the most adorable angry pout.

"Meanie!" he cried, one hand wandering up to rub the small of his back while the other reached out for his own towel. Moving that fast had caused the ache in his lower back to come back and for a moment he briefly entertained the thought of punishing Lovino for making him so sore. Then again, when he thought back to last night, he couldn't help the faint blush and the small smile, his heart fluttering at the memory of Lovino taking him.

Lovino ambled up to him and pressed an apologetic kiss to his wet shoulder, not noticing the smile or the blush. "Mi dispiace. You looked like you needed help waking up," he murmured, wrapping his towel around his hips and tying it off.

Feliciano hugged himself and hovered his hand above the reminiscent linger of Lovino's kiss, leaning back to have himself resting against his lover's wet chest. His eyes slipped closed after he rested his head atop of Lovino's shoulder, and then wondered if he really did look as tired as he felt.

He dearly treasured the time he and Lovino had shared the night before, but honestly, he could go for a long nap on the beach, Lovi spooning him, the sound of waves in the background enticing them to continue sleeping forever, and the sun being used as their blanket….

He snapped himself out of that fantasy at the sound of the guards' yelling for them to get out of the showers for once and to stop a number of other profane things.

Behind him Lovino sighed and moved away from Feliciano, slinking his way along to the door where the pissed off guard stood, whom was glaring at Feli.

The young man crept his way towards the towel rack and got himself a raggedy old thing for a towel before wrapping it around his waist and hurrying behind Lovino. With walking so fast he had to keep a hand gripped at the hem of his towel lest it fall down to his ankles and be whipped again.

They finally had a longer moment of togetherness come recreation time, where under the bleachers in the courtyard Feliciano took a short nap resting against Lovino's shoulder. He slept on Lovino's left side so Lovino could draw while he slept, and naturally the first thing Lovi drew was his sleeping lover's adorable face from the perspective he had.

Although, halfway through the rough sketch, Lovino couldn't help but put the drawing down to pull Feliciano closer, tucking his head into his neck and wrapping his arm around him like he was attempting to protect him from everyone and everything in the cruel world. He rested his chin down on the tangled mess of auburn curls, his fingers lazily stroking Feliciano's arm as he watched the rest of the inmates go on with their activities, pretty much keeping an eye out for any bullies who were out to hurt them.

"Sorry for keeping you up last night. You're falling asleep practically everywhere," Lovino whispered to him before placing a kiss on the top of his head. "I promise not to keep you up tonight. I don't want you falling asleep in the shower again."

Confused, Feliciano barely lifted his head up to look at him and ask, "I fell asleep in the shower?" He recalled having that momentary daydream before the guard started scolding him for staying in the shower so long, but he had no recollection of what the guard had actually said. He'd been so tired and it'd felt like…

_Oh._

So apparently he had fallen asleep for about twenty minutes according to Lovino, which was why the guard had been so mad at them for staying in. Now that he thought about it, another few prisoners were in the other stalls before his eyes had slipped closed.

"I didn't realize that I had fallen asleep so easily… Wait, why aren't you as tired as I am?"

The smirk Lovino gave him caused a pleasant shiver to run up Feliciano's spine. "I'm a pro like that." He chuckled when Feli nudged him, only making him hug him closer. "I'm just used to staying up late, it's no big deal," he remedied, kissing his lover's head right after. "You learn to build up stamina."

"I wonder if I'll ever build up that much stamina…" Feliciano murmured, burying his face in his boyfriend's neck.

"Well… I can always train you," he heard Lovino respond with a hint of mischief in his voice. The implications made another shiver race through him and he bit his lip. "We still have a while to be together."

"Maybe for my birthday you can give me a first class 'gym' membership," Feli teased, getting a chuckle out of Lovino.

"Depends on when it is," Lovi replied. "Speaking of, what day is today anyway?"

"March 10th."

"Oh, wow, time really does fly by. I mean, my birthday is already next week. March 17th, my 26th birthday."

"No way!"

"What?"

"That's my birthday too!"

They stared at each other in awe for a few minutes before they both fumbled and busted out with laughter, the coincidence of it all being the most joyous and funny occurrence to ever have happened to them at that moment. They were both so happy to have some time together before their fatal end, especially now with their birthdays being so close.

"But you're still older than me by two years, ya old man," Feli teased after they caught their breath from all that laughter.

Lovino tapped him on the nose and laughed again. "I'm sorry, sonny, but I don't got no hearing aid wit' me at the moment so yer gonna hafta speak up if ya want this World War II veteran ta be able ta hear ya."

Feliciano snuggled into his lover's chest with his head resting against Lovino's chest and chuckled quietly to himself. "I didn't mean you're that old, you big goof."

"I'd be a pedophile if I were that old. Or dead, but that's going to be soon anyway."

Feliciano immediately lost his smile and went quiet. He didn't want to ever think about that during the time he had left with Lovino, especially not on their birthday. Just the thought alone made him want to start crying and he curled up tighter against Lovino's side.

Lovino picked up on his wrongdoing and gave his boyfriend a gentle squeeze around the shoulders. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." He had gotten slightly better at watching what he said around Feliciano but sometimes things just slip.

"It's okay…" he heard Feli whisper, making Lovino feel worse. He hated upsetting him.

"No, it's not okay. I really shouldn't joke about… about that," Lovi replied, nudging his lover to get him to look up at him. "I won't do it again."

His only response was Feli relaxing next to him.

Now that that bad thought was out of their heads, the only thing the two could think of was what to give each other as a birthday present. It wasn't as if either one could just go out and get something for one another. No, they'd have to make something or do a service for each other… but what?

Over the next couple of days, the couple actually spent time away from each other in an attempt to find something to give as presents. Obviously there wasn't much to work with inside the prison and with the guards always watching over them, it proved more difficult than what they were expecting.

Finally—without each other knowing—they began working on making their presents.

Lovino's present was hidden in his back pocket during the daytime since his jumpsuit was baggy and he usually didn't have much on at night when he was curled up with Feliciano. And since he didn't have his jumpsuit on most nights, he had to hide it under the seat of the little metal chair in front of the desk. It was a small, makeshift daisy pin made of some of his old sketches from months before so Feli wouldn't get suspicious if there was less paper than before. He'd found a bobby pin a month or two ago when they weren't talking to each other, so he'd never gotten the chance to tell him of his found treasure and this way it would all be a surprise.

Feliciano, on the other hand, was working on a special piece of art for his partner. In this picture, he drew the two of them free, having a picnic in a field of daisies in clean, fashionable clothes. They were looking up into the sky, pointing at big fluffy clouds that resembled happy things. Feliciano worked on it mostly late at night when Lovino slept peacefully by his side and the very thought of them being this free made him want to cry but he muddled through, only stopping to snuggle with Lovi in the last couple of hours of the night. He kept it under his pillow, where Lovino wouldn't look for anything, for the older Italian preferred what was on top of the pillow and not what was under it.

And finally the day came—March 17th.

The first thing they did together was wake up earlier than usual to have an early-morning birthday romp in the sheets, ending in a tangle of sweaty limbs as the two lazily shared sweet kisses until it was time the guards came to wake everyone in the prison up. By the time they hurried into their clothes, they were nearly bursting at the seams with excitement and happiness, practically glued to each other's hips. As usual, they held hands on the way to breakfast.

Everything went spectacular up to lunch time. Lovino presented "birthday spaghetti" to his lover; he had mixed their plates of spaghetti together and put a breadstick standing up in the middle, telling Feliciano to blow out the "candle" and make a wish. Feliciano, who was hiding his flushed face and chuckling in embarrassment, waited to Lovino's quiet count to three before pretending to blow out the imaginary flame along with his boyfriend, his heart aching as he thought of his wish. They dug into their birthday lunch, even sharing a Lady and the Tramp moment with shared shyness, not even caring if anyone else in the prison was watching their romantic moment in the open.

Unfortunately, their apathy toward the rest of the inmates came back to hurt them.

Sitting under the bleachers where they usually came to spend their recreation time, Feliciano proposed that they exchange their presents. Lovino agreed, but suggested that his young lover go first. Giddy, Feliciano pulled the gently rolled up sketch from the inside of his jumpsuit, immediately feeling shy as he was about to give it to Lovino. With a soft blush, he outstretched his hand, holding out the present to his beloved. However, instead of Lovino taking it from him, it was roughly snatched out of his hand from above, causing both men to jump with a start.

On the bleachers above them were the inmates that bullied them before, grinning as their leader held up the rolled up sketch in triumph.

"Give that back!" Feliciano cried, immediately jumping to his feet and reaching up to grab the paper from the man. His efforts were unrewarded as the inmate held it up out of his reach, laughing.

Quickly, Lovino got to his feet, stepping protectively in front of Feliciano, glaring up at the men. "He said give it back."

"Or what? Pretty boy's going to try for the solitary confinement again? C'mon, take a shot and see how long you can go without your bitch this time," the guy taunted, ticking his head in the direction of the guards across the field. Before Lovino could reply, he unrolled the sketch to look at it, promptly bursting into a fit of laughter. "Oh this is gold!" he bellowed, showing his gang the picture. "First you two _are_ pansies and now you're skipping in them! How gay can you be?"

Feliciano, angered and hurt, made to try and grab the paper again but Lovino held him back gently. "That's none of your business!" the boy replied instead, glaring at their rival. "Please, just give it back before we get the guards to step in."

At the mention of the guards again, the big lug smirked down at Feliciano, holding out the paper as if he were giving it back. "No need for that."

Relieved, Feliciano reached out for his present.

_Riiiiiiiiiip_.

His hand froze in mid-reach, the sound of the inmate tearing the sketch in half making Feliciano's world fall all around him. With each new tear, he could just feel his heart sinking lower and lower in his chest, causing the smallest whimper to slip past his lips, and finally his heart hit rock bottom as a shower of ripped up pieces of paper came down like snow all around him and Lovino.

"There're no flowers here, fags, and no escaping, so get used to having and seeing nothing until you die," Feliciano heard the gruff voice of the gang leader tease before a roar of laughter from him and his friends start loud and then get softer as they jumped off the bleachers and walk away.

For a moment, the two stood still, saying nothing. Then slowly, shakily, Feliciano knelt down onto his knees, trembling hands reaching out to pick up each of the discarded pieces of paper that once had a picture of him and Lovino free on its snowy face.

Lovino, after arguing with himself over whether or not he should go smash in the gang's faces again, finally looked down at his devastated lover, his glare of anger giving in to a look of concern. "Feli…?" he whispered, kneeling down next to the boy. When he reached out to touch his shoulder, Feliciano looked away from him, his fingers clutching pieces of paper tightly. The sob threatening to escape was obvious in Feli's shaky tone as he spoke.

"Y… you didn't even get to see it…" he answered softly, and Lovino could just barely see the tear roll down his plump, red cheek.

Unsure of what to say, Lovino looked down at the ground, picking up a couple of the pieces Feliciano had not picked up. On one of the torn slips, he saw a daisy, and the remark about flowers now made sense to him. "Feliciano, what did you draw for me?"

For a long moment, Feliciano was silent, and Lovino figured he was trying to find the strength to speak without crying. Lovino gently rested his hand atop Feliciano's own trembling hands, hoping in some way the boy could find consolation in the touch.

Finally Feliciano glanced just slightly over at his lover. "It… I drew us… in a field of daises, h-having a picnic and cloud gazing… we were free. I drew us free."

The sudden crushing feeling to his heart was almost too much to bear as Lovino reached out to Feliciano with both hands, pulling him into a tight hug just as the boy let his tears go. Closing his eyes, Lovino began to rock his young lover under their favorite spot under the bleachers, gently shushing him. "It's okay…" he assured, pressing soft kisses to Feli's head and temple. "It's alright…"

Afraid of another confrontation, Lovi decided to not give Feliciano his present to him until later, when they were alone and safely away from the other inmates. Until then, he consoled Feliciano with hand-holding, sweet kisses, and gentle reassurances whenever he could and whenever no one was looking. He hated seeing his beloved this way, was sick of how they were treated; he didn't mind the attacks on him, but Feliciano didn't deserve any of this bullying.

At last they were brought to their cell to be alone for the night and Lovino ushered Feliciano in by the hand, leading him to the bottom bunk to have him sit down. He waited for the guard to lock them in and then walk away before addressing the other Italian.

"Hey…" he cooed, sliding onto the hard mattress beside his lover and taking his hand. He smiled when Feliciano looked up at him. "I still need to give you your present."

Immediately Feliciano protested. "No, no, it's not fair that I get a present and you don't. I-I'm fine without a present, I mean—" he was cut off by Lovino placing his finger against his lips.

"It's fine, I promise. Now shut up and let me give you your present," Lovino insisted, his smile never once leaving his face. When he pulled his hand away, he was relieved that Feliciano didn't start protesting again. Carefully, he got out the hairpin, taking Feliciano's hand to place it in his palm.

"I made this for you," he started to say, his voice softer. "I didn't give it to you earlier because I didn't want to risk the chance of those assholes taking this away too."

This time Feliciano didn't say anything, staring at the makeshift daisy in his hand in awe and a mix of other emotions Lovino couldn't quite identify but took as something good.

Lovino picked up the pin again, opening the bobby pin to pin it into Feliciano's hair above his ear. As he pulled his hand away to admire his handiwork, he brushed his fingers lovingly across Feli's cheek. Beautiful. I knew it'd suit you," he whispered, picking up Feliciano's hand again to lightly kiss his knuckles. "Happy birthday to you."

Feliciano felt his eyes become wet again as Lovino began to sing for him.

"Happy birthday to you," the boy sang, smiling weakly.

"Happy birthday, my dear Feli, happy birthday to you." This time Lovino leaned in to kiss his forehead and then the tip of his nose before finally pecking his lover's lips.

Blushing, Feliciano looked down bashfully. "Thank you…" he murmured, pushing back some hair behind his other ear. "Happy birthday, Lovi." When he looked up, he was met with a serious expression instead of a smile. "Lovi…?"

"There's hope. You'll get to have real daisies some day, Feliciano, I promise you. Picnics and clouds, too," Lovino told him, taking both of his hands now and looking him straight in the eye.

Feliciano gave him a perplexed look, slightly concerned with how serious Lovino suddenly was.

"We're going to escape."


	13. Authors' Note

We're on an indefinite hiatus. I'm sorry.

-Char


	14. Authors' Note 2

This story is now discontinued as we have moved on to other things. I might finish it myself some day but not any time soon.

I'm sorry. Thank you so much for the support and reviews and views-everything.

It meant a lot.

-Char


End file.
